Oblivious
by SiriusProtege
Summary: AU. Lily Evan’s life is far from perfect. Orphaned and alienated from her sister, she lives with a school friend. After avoiding the Marauders for 5 years when Lily and Lottie reluctantly appear on their radar life gets…strange. Lily’s POV. Diary-like.
1. Default Chapter

_**Siriusprotégé**_

_Oblivious _

**_Disclaimer_**: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine! Thanks to the over-active imagination of a 15 year old girl.

**_Summary: _**AU. Lily Evan's life is far from perfect. Orphaned and alienated from her sister, she lives with her school friend. After avoiding the Marauders for 5 years when Lily and Lottie reluctantly appear on their radar life gets…strange. Lily's POV. Diary-like.

WARNING: there will be alcohol abuse and a lot of swearing in this fanfic.

* * *

Chapter one:

**Saturday 31st December**

Hey. My name is Lily Anne Evans; call me Lilikins and you will die.

I have an unfortunate sarcastic sense of humour, and I am also mad, not in the lunatic sense of the word – I'm just a little 'eccentric'. You can blame that on Lottie, she corrupted me with her stupid love for life.

Well, I'm getting ahead of myself so…some background knowledge on me: I'm sixteen years old and go to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. My parents were killed in a car crash before my second year at Hogwarts and my sister Petunia blamed me for their death. She now lives with an aunt. I don't live with them. Said "Aunt" shares the same outlook on witchcraft that Petunia does, she would rather streak down the high street than admit magic exists. So I live with one of my best friends, Lottie Price.

Lottie's Mum died when she was very young and her father is hardly ever around, leaving us to the good graces of her stepmother and stepsisters. They are all really nasty pieces of work, so you can imagine life here isn't too good. Yet I'd prefer to live through this with Lottie than with Petunia and my Aunt without her, tells you something about Petunia and my Aunt.

We have one more friend called Katie Cooper, she like Lottie is a pureblood, not that that's really important. However unlike Lottie her family is blissfully happy, she would have invited me to live with her, but unfortunately her family is quite poor – don't say I told you though.

I've just read through what I've written and I've realised I haven't actually told you Lottie and mines little problem, well coping mechanism more like. Don't judge me! But when you have an evil stepmother and ugly stepsisters living in a house with you trying to make your life hell, you need some help sometimes – just to get through the day. So when we were 14 we accidentally found out about the wonders of alcohol. Now, we aren't alcoholics - we are just permanently drunk in the holidays.

So you're probably wondering why I'm still sober at the moment. It's because Lottie and I wake up every morning around 7 and I go for a swim and Lottie goes for a run, we find it helps de-stress us, and it gives us 2 and a ½hours of sobriety. After that we have to wake up Newboobs (nickname for evil stepmother) and the Brats (nickname for evil stepsisters) and about an hour after that we start to drink. Unfortunately we can both hold our drink so it takes a lot to get sufficiently drunk.

Well I forbid you to feel sorry me. You don't need to pity me because Lottie's madness is unfortunately contagious; I am remarkably in love with life.

Lottie's just came back from her shower and is reading what I've just written; she thinks I'm mad for writing a diary but it's her fault I am that way, so I'm blaming her.

**Oy! Just because the Price insanity and arrogance had rubbed off on you doesn't mean that it's my fault, Ned's as much to blame as I am!**

Ned is Lottie's and, well hypothetically speaking, my brother. He plays Quidditch for the Appleby Arrows and is remarkably like Lottie. It's an on going joke between the three of us that all the Prices are witty, arrogant and insane. This is true, sort of. The reason it's funny is because Lottie is extremely shy (like me actually) and only acts like a 'Price should' when she's around people she's comfortable with. You know Lottie's accepted you when she starts complimenting herself and making witty comments.

**I resent that!**

You can resent it all you like it's still true.

**That's not the point!**

Aaaahhh. No witty comments?

**Lily you know perfectly well my wit doesn't start working till 10. My arrogance starts at 8, but it is physically impossible for me to be witty until 10. Coffee? **

Yes, two sugars please.

We always have coffee and never have tea. You see the only tea we drink is Irish tea, (tea with a shot or two of whisky in it) we are so used to having them that normal tea tastes absolutely disgusting. So we always have coffee in the mornings.

O shit! Lottie has just kindly reminded me that it's New Years Eve. Bloody brilliant!

You might be wondering why I'm so put out, well let me explain. My stepmother, well Lottie's stepmother has recently become good friends with Mrs Potter and her 'crowd'. Well Mrs Potter holds a New Years party every year, only problem is something's wrong with their ball room so Newboobs has offered our house for the Party to be held at.

You might be wondering why this is so unfortunate. Well there are two reasons. 1) Lottie and I hate Balls; we've got out of them every year by pretending to be ill or getting grounded. However if it's held here we will have no such excuse. We did break the chandelier that Newboobs got Lottie's dad for his birthday so we could get grounded when they find out about that… But I doubt it seeing as Lottie's dad hated the chandelier to begin with.

And 2) well I'll say two words 'The Marauders'. The Marauders are four mischievous boys in our year, not to mention the most popular boys in school. James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. They are I'll have to admit really good looking! Especially Potter, Black and Lupin. Potter and Black are your original fit guys. They're tall, dark, muscular handsome strangers … but, they know it and they use it to the best of their advantage.

In other word they are complete man whores. It has been said they have had the same amount of girls as pranks they've pulled. Lupin however is a prefect and most girls like him better that Potter and Black. Lupin is the complete opposite of those two, he's blonde and blue eyed, totally gorgeous and the best bit, he won't treat you like a piece of meat; he'll actually talk to you like you are a human being. Peter is rather short and not muscular like the other three but he's cute in a short cubby way.

Before you ask "No" I don't have a crush on the Marauders, but the brats do as you'll find out when you hear Lottie's wake up call. That's the problem you see, Lottie and I aren't popular. In-fact we hate attention of any kind so naturally the Marauders don't know we exist, which is fine by us; however, they'll be here to help set up, probably with their little fan clubs seeing as most of those girls parents move with Mrs Potter's 'crowd.' This means the brats are going to do anything they can to humiliate us in their presence. O god I need an Irish tea!

**

* * *

Later after the Irish tea:**

O my God! You can probably tell that we are a little tipsy… well, before you go getting all judgemental again I'll tell you why.

I'd shared my thoughts with Lottie and we both agreed that if we were going to get through today we were going to need something to start us off. So she went and got the fire whisky and I started to make the tea.

After we'd had our Irish, as we call them, Toddie, the house elf, came in and well…

"Morning Toddie" I smiled at him, I always have liked Toddie, he is unbelievably sweet and has always helped us out with our 'habit'.

Lottie, however, groaned into the counter top, Toddie only ever talked to us in the morning to say one thing, "Toddie please tell me that you don't want me to wake them up yet?"

"O I hope you haven't, I don't think my sanity or my liver can take it!" well somebody has to be witty when Lottie's wit is on vacation. It was 9:00 so Lottie wouldn't say anything witty for at least another hour.

Lottie groaned in agreement, "Unfortunately Miss Lottie I have. However you shouldn't…"

"Do you want to wake them up or should I?" Lottie asked me.

"You wake up Newboobs and I'll wake up the Brats." Lottie nodded in agreement and so we shouted from the safety of the kitchen.

"Newboobs get up before your tits freeze in that position!" I don't know where Lottie got that from but her randomness is oddly endearing.

"And Brats get your arses out of bed. The Marauders are here and if you lucky you might be able to get a good shag!" It's good to piss off the twins first thing in the morning. Oddly stress relieving.

"Miss Lottie, Miss Lily you shouldn't say such things!" Toddie looked at us urgently.

"Why not? We do it every morning, and besides you know the only way to get the Brats out of bed is to mention 'Marauder' and 'shag' in the same sentence." Lottie is as ever blunt around this time in the morning. Especially seeing as our heads are usually very tender in the morning too.

"Misses, they're here!" Toddie said looking exasperated, which is a very funny look on a house elf I can tell you.

"What do you mean? Who are here?" I asked feeling the cold lump of embarrassment fill my stomach.

"Mrs Potter and her friends to set up the Ball rooms," Toddie sighed obviously put out.

"Well it's their own bloody fault for arriving this early, if they didn't want to hear it they shouldn't have come so early should they?" Lottie follows in the true Price tradition of 'nothing is my fault if it is embarrassing', it's something I'm getting used to and to tell the truth not only am I getting good at it but I'm finding it very useful.

"Right, well, do we really want to be here for this?" I asked Lottie

"No. What are you thinking of?"

"Well why don't we go shopping? We've got nothing better to do and that means we can escape…" I let my sentence trail off now that I was aware we actually had an audience down in the main entrance hall.

"Good idea lets go!" Lottie decided, picking up her bag and throwing on her jacket all in one fluid motion. She can be annoyingly graceful when she wants to be.

"But Miss Lottie, Miss Lily you can't go, if your not here Miss Nicole will have a fit!" Toddie exclaimed urgently, whilst running behind us, trying to keep up.

"Toddie, Newboobs is going to have a fit when she sees the chandelier we might as well escape whilst she's pretending to be nice." You know I've come to the conclusion that bluntness is another one of Lottie's fortes.

"Why am I going to have a fit after I see the chandelier?" great, Newboobs arrives to stop us from escaping. We'd just reached the entrance hall and all its occupants when Newboobs entered the scene.

"Bloody brilliant! This just makes the week." Lottie's wit seemed to be appearing although I have no idea what she meant by that.

"Charlotte, your language is atrocious." Uh oh. She called Lottie 'Charlotte'. You never call Lottie 'Charlotte' unless you have a death wish. You see, Lottie's mum was the only one that called her Charlotte, after she died Lottie made sure no one else did.

"Charlotte?" Lottie exclaimed out raged, looking like she could commit murder.

"Come Lots, lets get you out of here before you do something you'll regret," I, always the good and supportive friend, tried to get her out.

"Some how I don't think murdering her would be something I'd regret!" Lottie was still looking at her but she let me drag her outside.

In the mean time I caught the look on the Marauders' faces, their mothers' faces and their fan clubs' faces. They all had the same expression of disgust aimed in our direction, I have to admit I wanted to get out of there as fast as I could and I could tell Lottie felt the same, but would Newboobs let us? No she wouldn't would she, she just couldn't let it go she just had to keep us and torture us until everybody thought we were the most horrible people in the world.

"Wait! I want to see what you've done to the chandelier before you go." She marched over to the doors that led to the ball room and…

There it was. The absolutely disgusting chandelier which we had been told to clean the Muggle way was broken on the floor. The reason no one else had heard it drop was because Lottie and I apart from being frightfully drunk at the time had wanted to listen to our music rather loudly so we'd put a silencing charm on the ball room.

We waited…

And waited…

And finally the explosion came, "That was a very expensive chandelier!" she roared at us.

"It was also a very ugly chandelier!" Lottie mumbled under her breath to me, hardly moving her lips, this comment combined with the shocked and outraged faces of the people in-front of us set me off in nervous giggles… I was sure I was going to be lynched and I thought it would be better to go laughing than crying, seeing as if I wasn't laughing, I would be crying. I simply hate attention, especially seeing as it's always this type of attention that I receive. The type I don't want.

I, of course, then set Lottie off laughing as well and the two of us could barely stand up.

"You think this is FUNNY? Wipe those smirks off you faces at once!" I tried but the second I looked at her face I burst out laughing again, she looked like she would kill us. Mind you they all looked like they would kill us, with the exception of the Marauders; they just looked at us like we were something rather disgusting.

"You are grounded! You can forget coming to the ball tonight! Now go to your rooms!" she looked at us triumphantly and I tried hard not to laugh as Lottie bit her lip to keep in her elated "YES!"

"Fair enough, I suppose we deserve that. However, I wouldn't worry Mrs Potter we have another chandelier that is actually pr… that you can use, so we haven't completely ruined your Ball." Lottie smiled charmingly whilst trying to look upset… I'll give her this she is a very good actress.

We quickly turned and went up the stairs glad to be away from the stares and happy that we are grounded.

So now I am in Lottie's room, she's off flying some where and I'm writing in here… but the best bit is that we won't have to see those people for the rest of the day, so this morning is officially the first morning either Lottie or I have been sober for over two weeks! Great isn't it?

**

* * *

Later on in the day, 1 hour to B-day (Ball day!).**

Well, we are in the Kitchen again and still sober. Lottie's warming up some soup for us to have and Katie's heads in the fire. You know, by floo, I could never get the hang of that thing.

Katie wants to know why we're grounded and Lottie's telling her the whole story. Poor Katie, her mother is actually physically forcing her to go. I told her to sneak up to our rooms because then she can come to our annual New Years party, consisting of eating pasta, listening to loud music and drinking lots and lots of alcohol (are you surprised?)

O, and to make things worse, it turns out that the Potters, the Marauders, and several fan club members are staying over, this of course means that tomorrow will make up for us staying sober today.

Uh oh, I hear voices, lots of unwanted voices. Katie's gone and Lottie's looking for another exit, which of course she won't find.

"Don't worry Sirius; Toddie will gladly give you something to eat." The simpering and dreaded voice of Olivia reached my ears. Lottie groaned and had started to bang her head on the table as the Marauders and the fan club walks in.

"What are you doing down here? You're grounded."

"Yes, but no one mentioned being grounded meant starving to death!" Lottie said this to the counter top. Her voice is getting very tight, I hope they don't stay long.

The girls have broken into laughter and the Marauders are grinning. This means one thing, they have been bitching and making lies up about me and Lottie, bloody brilliant. Soon we will know the joys of a prank-fest.

Lottie's obviously come to the same conclusion, because she's looking for the nearest thing that's alcoholic, well I hope she is, because when she finds it I want some! Actually she could be looking for a frying pan to hit Olivia and Alice with, that wouldn't be too bad.

"Is my brother here yet?" Lottie is attempting to be civil, that's kind of her, actually no, she's just trying to cover up the scraping noise as she pulls the frying pan towards her.

"No… not yet, why?"

"It's none of you bleeding business why," I would have chosen something a little bit stronger than bleeding; Lottie is definitely being uncharacteristically restrained today.

"Ah we're touchy tonight aren't we?" Lottie's not replying. I don't blame her; with comebacks as pathetic as that I wouldn't bother either.

"Come on Lils lets leave. Toddie could you send two tea's to my room please?"

"Tea Miss?"

"Yes Toddie _our _type of tea."

O, I love Lottie; sometimes she can just read my mind. Getting up we leave the Kitchens which immediately erupts with laughter after we left… well you can imagine that I don't like the idea of what they've been saying about us… in fact it's really upsetting… I will not let it get to me! O, who am I kidding it's getting to me and I can't stop it. I feel really worthless now… really need that tea!

I think Lottie feels the same but it could also be the fact that today's the day her mother died that always makes her upset… however they do have the habit of making people feel worthless.

The grounds really are beautiful out here. It's covered in snow! So pure… so white… if I wasn't feeling so bloody depressed it would make me happy. The tea's arrived along with…

"Olivia what are you doing?" Lottie looks tired; she always looks like that when she feels down.

"I need to borrow a dress… your father says mine isn't smart enough." She's marched herself haughtily over to Lottie's wardrobe and started looking around.

Lottie rolls her eyes at me; not bothering to tell Olivia that there is no way she could fit into any of her clothes and too down to care. She just accepts the tea… I don't worry about Lottie. Lottie always bounces back; she loves life and is grateful for what she's got even if she's got a funny way of showing it, just like me.

"Can I borrow this?" it was more of a statement than a question, Lottie looks to see which dress Olivia's pulled out. It's a long clingy sapphire blue one the same colour as Lottie's eyes; it would stretch to fit anybody. Lottie nods.

There's a knock on the door. Someone pops their head round we can't see cause we're sitting in the dark, "Hello flowers," Ned's entered and has turned the light on, "what you doing sitting in the dark?"

"Nothing," we both reply.

"I don't believe it you're both sober! Why aren't you getting changed?" he's frowning although I'm sure he already knows.

"We are grounded." Lottie replied grinning, she's always been able to switch her emotions; unfortunately it hasn't rubbed off on me.

"O, so it's you that crashed the chandelier. You've caused quite the scandal, the Brats are telling everyone." He smiles at us, "What's wrong?" damn him, he knows us so well. It was stupid of me to think we could hide the fact that we're down. "And don't say cause today's the day Mum died, because I know that's a lie." Damn that man!

"The Brats are living up to their nickname. Do I need to elaborate?" Lottie obviously wasn't going to answer so I stepped in. He's just nodding.

"I had an idea it might be that, because all their friends are under the impression that you're the Brats."

"Really they had the guts to say it to your face? That was brave of them." I warned you I was sarcastic.

"No. I heard Potter and Black talking to some of the girls about how to get back at the Brats. At first I thought they were talking about Olivia and Alice until I noticed they were talking to Alice, so I figure they must mean you, you don't mix with them do you?

Lottie snorted, "I think I can safely say 'no'. Although it's nice to know we can expect a prank-fest when we get back to school, that's if they can find us at school." True, we have managed to stay off their radar at school for five years and a term; I think we can manage to escape them for two more years.

I think he's getting the hint that we want to be left alone, "Do you want me to send Charlie up when he gets here?" Charlie is Ned's best friend. They've been that way since the beginning of Hogwarts and they were blissfully happy when they found out they managed to get onto the Appleby Arrows together, he is basically another brother to us.

I shrug, "only if he wants to come." I mean he's hardly going to get a lot out of us.

He's sighing at us and is leaving slowly.

**

* * *

An hour later (yes B-day has arrived)**

We are sitting with our legs in-between the banisters watching the party and Katie is with us. I know what you're thinking but we are bored and we've at least got to make it look like we're sorry for not being at the Ball. We can't start our own party until they start eating, it's awfully annoying.

I have to say that Lottie's sapphire blue dress looks absolutely horrible on Olivia! It's made for really skinny people like Lottie or me and no offence to Olivia but she's not skinny.

Okay, I just read that and I sound so arrogant but I'm not I promise it was just Lottie rubbing off on me. However, she really does look horrible. The Marauders look devilishly handsome as they always do; however, judging from the conversation that Ned heard they really shouldn't be in my good books.

Lottie wants to write me a note wait there.

**Lils do you want to stir up some trouble? (Wide eyed expression of complete innocence) **

_What type of trouble?_

Guys please don't, I actually have to sit and eat with them before I can come and join you two in the kitchen.

**Don't worry Kate it won't affect you… just the Marauders and the Brats… I want to get them back for calling _us_ Brats.**

_What are you thinking of?_

**Well… you know the Brats have a huge crush on the Marauders? I mean they've even nicked a pair of their boxers for god's sake. Anyway, I was just noticing how the Marauders aren't too fond of them, so, I thought we could maybe give the Brats a little help…**

_Lottie get to the point…_

**Well, it involves trailing mistletoe. **

Wait; let me get this straight, you want to charm mistletoe to follow the Marauders to _help_ the Brats?

_Lottie, remind me never to get on your bad side. You see Kate, the Marauders don't like the Brats, and the Brats are going to trail them all night, so, if the Marauders have mistletoe over their heads all night… who's going to keep on kissing them?_

Clever!

**Well what can I say, I'm a born genius. **_(Insert large snort from Katie and I)_

So we charmed the mistletoe to follow each one of the Marauders and sure enough, Lottie was right, the Brats are having a field day. Not surprisingly, the Marauders aren't looking too happy.

**

* * *

In the kitchen around 11:40**

Hey, its 11:40, almost New Years, Katie's joined us but she can't hold her drink so she's completely gone, dancing on the table… Lottie is waltzing around the room, on her own; she says it's tradition to waltz into the New Year. The music is really loud but no one can hear because we've put a silencing spell on the kitchen!

O wait, Lottie is making a toast.

"I declare a toast to myself and Lily for successfully getting grounded and escaping the New Years party for the 5th year in a row!" Lots of cheering on mine and Katie's part, "Wait I'm not done yet! And I declare a toast to the house elves for their amazing spaghetti bolognaise, which they have cooked for us despite the fact that they had to cook for the stupid Ball upstairs," lots of cheering on our part again.

I'm now waltzing around the room like Lottie. Olivia had arrived with some friends.

"O, Olivia darling how are you? I hope you're having fun at the Ball, yes? O, Olivia I love your dress! I really do I can't for the life of me remember where you got it from though. Lils do you know where Olivia got her dress from?" Lottie's looking wide eyed at me I can't help it I've got to laugh.

"Why yes. Lottie, it's yours stupid!" I stop in front of them, "O my giddy Aunt, I didn't see you lot there!" the Marauders are standing behind them and Lottie's left me to waltz on her own again, "How are you?"

"Er… sober," Lupin answers me.

"SOBER? Why you poor people why on earth are you sober at New Years?

"Your father is rationing the amount of alcohol we can have," This time Potter answered me; I think Olivia and her girlfriends are in shock.

"He's not my father… I'm not related to the Price's in anyway whatsoever I just started living here with Lottie after my parents died. However, that is beside the point, you're sober and it is not traditional to be sober on New Years so" I gestured brightly "help yourself to some Vodka!" I lift up my glass and grin charmingly at them shoving my glass in their faces. The girls seem to of disappeared. Alarm bells are ringing in my head but I think I'll ignore them.

"Or whiskey or wine or rum or beer or champagne or… What else do we have Lils?" Lottie has rejoined me again, "Your Mum is really scary!" Lottie's pointing at Potter who's grinning at us.

"Really?" he's still grinning. They're all grinning at us.

"Yes" I back Lottie up, "I mean so the wake up call was rather embarrassing and crude, but that's no need to look at us like we're something really disgusting… we made a mistake give us a break… and then we did her a huge favour by breaking the ugly chandelier, I mean it was an ugly chandelier and it was ugly… did I mention it was ugly?"

"Er yes."

"So she then gives a death stare that's worse than Lottie's and I'm telling you that's one scary death stare! And looks like she wants to kill us, I mean we did her a favour! Mind you, they all looked like they wanted to kill us except for you lot, you looked like we were something that needed to be squished. It was really scary. I had to laugh to stop my self from crying! But, on the bright side we did get grounded! So I guess we did get rewarded for breaking the ugly chandelier that was ugly." I must have said this quite fast because it was taking a while for them to process what I just said.

"Er, sorry, but… um… how is getting grounded a good thing?" Lupin's looking at us curiously; he looks quite scary when he's curious.

"Well you see that's a long story, but to cut a long story short. We Lottie, Katie and I hate balls, I mean you spend hours trying to find a dress, which you'll never be able to wear again because you wore it once and you probably won't be able to fit into it cause everyone's always trying to lose weight so they then go anorexic and then their dead so they can't wear it again anyway… so Lottie and I always pretend to be sick or get grounded so we don't have to go to your boring balls."

"Yeah, and then we have our own party here!" Lottie's joined me again, "see we decorate the small ball room and put in a huge table. Have you seen the table? That's a stupid question. And then we put really loud music on and have spaghetti bolognaise and then we go into the big Ball Room and we have really loud music and lot of alcohol and then we have bean bag races, have you ever had a bean bag race?"

"No" for some reason Potter and Black are laughing and Lupin's trying to keep a straight face.

"Well, it's really good fun. Last year though we didn't, we figured out the chandelier could swing so we were swinging on the chandelier, you know, and landing on the table; the huge one, however, don't tell Newboobs because she found shoeprints on them when she came back and I told her that it was the dog… I mean how stupid can you get? The dog doesn't wear shoes so how on earth could it leave shoe prints? And we don't even have a dog so you can see show stupid she is can't you?

"Don't forget the year you lot played Quidditch! That was funny." Katie had joined us now. For some reason Black appears to be hyperventilating. I don't know why.

"Yeah, Ned and Charlie came over and we flew around the house throwing cushions at each other and then we all ganged up on Ned and Lottie except their really good at Quidditch so it didn't work and Lottie's aim is annoyingly good when she's drunk and she knocked me off my broom! But it was still fun," the Clock stuck 12. "Happy New Year everyone!" lots of cheers of happy New Year come back and Lottie, Katie and I hug.

"I'm tired I'm going to go to sleep," Lottie can barely keep her eyes open and is wobbling dangerously.

"Okay." Katie and I reply the boys are looking at us curiously and jump slightly as Lottie falls on the floor asleep.

"She just collapsed!" Lupin looks at me worried even though Potter and Black seem to find it hysterical.

"Huh? O, don't worry, she does it all the time!" For some reason everything's gone dark.

* * *

A/N: hey this is my second fanfic however it is very different from my 1st one which is called a fine line between love and hate which actually sticks to canon. This one however is rather AU.

Please Read and Review. And please don't torture my baby!


	2. Chapter 2

_**Siriusprotégé**_

_Oblivious _

**_Disclaimer_**: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine! Thanks to the over-active imagination of a 15 year old girl.

**_Summary: _**Lily Evans' life is far from perfect. She's an orphan and lives with her best friend rather than spending time with her horrible sister. Her life is not as good as it appears to be and things get a lot more complicated when the Marauders, the most popular guys in school begin to notice her and her friends. Especially one Marauder in particular. From Lily's point of view. Kind of like a diary.

WARNING: there will be alcohol abuse and a lot of swearing in this fanfic.

* * *

Chapter 2

Damn, my back.

I woke up around seven this morning with gruelling back cramp and one hell of a hangover. Luckily Toddie made us a HOC (hangover cure). I swear that house elf is a genius; he makes some home mad concoction with a happiness potion mixed in so we end up acting like we're drunk again for the first ten minutes after drinking the stuff.

O bollocks.

I just read my last entry about last night. Of course it took me an age to decipher my writing, but if what I've read happened then we are in big trouble. I hope Lottie has something to blackmail the Brats with. O God not to mention the Marauders.

O my giddy aunt! Lottie has just put on "Rescue Me" by Fontella Bass as loud as she possibly can and at the moment is chasing Katie around the kitchen, singing at the top of her particularly boisterous voice. If you have ever heard Lottie singing you will understand why Katie's running.

I can't help it. I've got to dance - no one can resist that rhythm! I'm trying very hard to drown out Lottie but I'm beginning to think nothing will shut her up. The girl may be blessed with looks and brains, but her singing voice is worse than a tomcat yowling.

"Do you think they're still drunk?" Whoever said that wasn't female. Katie's gone bright red and Lottie is now banging her head on the counter top, but she _is_ still singing loudly. Turning round who do I see? Yes, you guessed it: the Marauders are out in full force. Wearing, surprisingly, the same as Lottie i.e. boxers and a t-shirt. Why do they have to grin like that?

"You guys are remarkably…" Potter seems to be struggling. I'll help him out a bit. Just this once.

"Happy?"

"Alive. For people who were absolutely out of it last night." He's doing that bloody lop sided grin. You know I think he thinks it's cute. How wrong he is.

"How was the floor last night Price? I hear it's very comfy." Black is such a… Lots want to write something.

**Oooo and here was me thinking star boy was all brawn and no brains!**

Immature I know, but that's Lottie for you! Laughing at the comment anyway I've earned myself an odd look from the Marauders. Katie wants to read it.

"You know that could be misinterpreted as a complement," Katie always picks up on these things.

"I suppose but think of my tone of voice and my facial expression," Lottie looks at her with a raised eyebrow. Katie laughs

The boys exchange looks and look like they're about to ask something…think Evans. What can you say to get them off this topic…wait a minute they came from the north stairs!

The north wing is the only wing that has stairs leading directly to the kitchens and therefore is our wing. Our haven has been breached!

"What did you…?"

"What were you doing coming from our wing?" I cut in quickly.

"Your wing? We just came down the stairs outside our rooms." Lupin looks confused.

"Your rooms? But all of the Brats' friends are meant to be in their wing. Your rooms are in their wing. Why were you in ours?" Lottie's in interrogating mode.

"Well…er…we kind of had enough of the…er…'Brats' and their friends as you call them and asked your dad if we could be moved as far away from them as possible," Potter actually looks slightly disgusted.

"Oh, he's not Lily's dad. But that's not the point, what did they do? You seemed fond enough of them last night." Lottie's looking wide eyed and innocent, this means she's up to something. Oh, of course, the mistletoe!

"Well this stupid mistletoe started hanging over our heads so every time the…er…'Brats' saw us they stuck their tongues down our throats." Ew! Black has no idea when to stop on the details does he?

Lottie's biting her lip to stop herself from grinning, "That must have been a real hardship for you."

Katie's now disappeared under the table…I may have to join her soon… that or go purple.

"Well you try having someone you can't stand sticking their tongues down your throat at every possible opportunity,"

"Too much detail Black… Tell me is your language usually this crude or just about people you hate?" Lottie's getting back at him for the floor comment and I'm pretty sure I'm purple at the moment. "Oh, sorry to ruin your morning, but it looks like the Brats are going to be doing that for a long time. The mistletoe hasn't gone away yet," Lottie finishes with a triumphant simile. I'm having an awful lot of trouble breathing.

Suddenly there is a muffled voices coming down the corridor, "Ned I don't care what you say! Tell me the truth!" Charlie's just trailed in after Ned looking more than a little put out.

Humph. This had peaked my interest, "truth about what? Who are you talking about?"

"What?" he looks worried, "Oh nothing…ok, you and Lottie. Wait a minute," uh oh I really don't like the way his eyes have lit up… it is very unnerving. "Lily isn't a Price. Lily can be saved! We must save Lily!" Ok now I'm extremely worried.

"What are you going on about AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH" Charlie has just picked me up and is at this moment throwing me out into the snow in my pyjamas…HE IS DEAD!

"I don't care what you say you are not getting me outside in this. NED PUT ME DOWN!" Ok so now Lottie and Katie have joined me and I don't know about the other two but I am seriously pissed off.

"This means war!" grabbing a fist full of snow I pelt it as hard as I can in Ned's direction hitting him square in the face. "Yes!" I pump my arm in the air, but my victory was short lived… as both Charlie and Ned started to bombard us with snow balls.

We fought back - winning of course, seeing as it was three against two. The Marauders are just standing in the door watching… and they say they know how to have fun! Well they've got a funny way of showing it!

"Uh oh!" Katie just threw a snow ball and has some how managed to hit Black straight in the face. It would have been a good shot… except she was aiming for Charlie who just happens to be left of them… far left of them…like 2 metres left.

"Oi what was that for?" he doesn't look too happy.

"Serves you right Black! For standing like a bloody mongoose in the middle of a snowball fight!" Lottie quickly ducks as Black send a snowball flying her way.

"Lils, if I had any idea that calling him a bleeding mongoose would make him chase me I wouldn't of called him one!" Lottie mutters as she runs past me as fast as she can, I can't help but laugh… my laugh was cut short however as I got a mouthful of snow complements of Potter. This snow fight is getting bigger and more personal by the second.

"NO! Put me down! I swear Edward Price if you drop me in this stream I will make you wish you were never born!" Ned's holding Lottie up by her feet as if he's about to dunk her in the stream.

"Sorry sister dear, I am immune to your threats." Ned grinned and motioning Charlie to go get someone else to put in the stream. Poor them.

"AAAAA! No Charlie no! Put me down! Charlie if you put me down I'll give you a chocolate chip cookie! Please? AAAA" O My Giddy Aunt this water is so cold you have no idea!

"You are so going to die for doing that!"

"Any idea's Lots?" I mutter under my breath at her,

"A few but what's yours?" damn that girl knows me so well.

"Do you still have the album of embarrassing photos you were going to reveal on Ned and Charlie's wedding days?" She nodded slowly, trying to stop the weeds in her hair from falling onto her face. "Well you know how they've got Chloe and Alice over?"

"Yes, what's your point?"

"Well, since Chloe and Alice are over, I think we should give the brides a little preview."

"Oh, we're wicked" Lottie's grinning evilly at me and I'm fairly certain I have the same image on my face. I told you Lottie had corrupted me.

"Lottie Price and Lily Evans get out of that stream immediately!"

"Uh oh." That was Newboobs "some how I don't think she's too happy." I murmur to Lottie as we head towards the bank of the stream.

"Of course she's not happy Lils we aren't acting in the way that _proper_ ladies should." Lottie imitated Newboobs scarily well.

Ned, still laughing, held out his hand and pulled Lottie and I out of the stream, giving his sister a quick look up and down as we walked back to the house, he suddenly realised what she was wearing, "Why the hell are you wearing my boxers? And for that matter my air-tex?"

"Your boxers are comfy and so are your air-texs so I'm wearing them." Lottie replied shrugging, oblivious to the fact she now had the attention of everybody in the hall.

"Ok let me re-phrase this. How did you get them?"

"You remember that time you found Lily and I in town? And we then crashed at yours and Charlie's?"

"Yes"

"Well you lent them to me to sleep in and I never gave them back." Finding this an adequate answer he shrugged and grabbed her in a head lock messing up her soaking raven black hair with his knuckles.

Breaking free and using me as a human shield she dragged me up the steps and into the doorway where I stood still in temporary surprise. I had not expected to reach the doorway that quickly, especially when I was sure my feet had frost bite.

"Mistletoe, Lils!" Ned shouted out of no where just as Potter started to walk through the doorway.

"Huh?" I looked at him in surprise just as Lottie whirled round in amusement to see the out come of her brothers' trouble making. Potter being the idiot that he is stood still and looked up to see the bloody mistletoe.

"You and James are under the mistletoe," I looked at Ned then at Lottie then finally at Potter before looking back at Ned

"Really?" then taking one particularly long step to the side, into the safety of the Hall I grinned, "not any more!" then I caught a glance at Potter's face when I turned to go upstairs and almost burst out laughing, it was quite obvious he wasn't used to girls doing that to him. Arrogant bugger!

I followed Katie upstairs whilst dragging a hyperventilating Lottie behind me, "Lottie we are going to need something a lot crueller than that photo album."

"I don't know what you're in a stress about; did you see Potter's face? It was priceless. So was Black's for that matter. Oh you make me so proud Lils! Finally I have nothing left to teach you!" Lottie smiled her award winning smile at me.

I shoved her into her room, "go get changed you stupid woman. And have a shower - you smell of pond water."

"So do you!"

"Shut up!"

* * *

**An Hour Later (Ok two hours later… fine two hours and a half!):**

Finally! After having a shower and after making sure all signs and smells of the stream had been banished I rooted through my wardrobe for something relatively smart for me to wear. However, I was having little success. Not because I lack smart clothes but because my wardrobe at home is very different to the wardrobe I have at school.

You see like I've mentioned before Lottie, Katie and I don't like being noticed by people. We're quite shy I guess. Anyway, so our clothes at school are usually not fitted and rather baggie, for example an air-tex, a hoodie and a pair of jeans that are usually a size to big.

At home however our clothes are fitted and could be considered revealing – though not slutty (well not often); we have no friends around here so we don't mind people looking from a distance as long as they don't approach us and we don't have to talk to them.

Now you're probably wondering why on earth I'm worried and why I don't just go to my trunk and get out some of the clothes from school. Well two reasons spring to mind

1) Lottie's dad wouldn't approve when we have such nice clothes upstairs.

2) our trunks are up in the attic waiting to go back to school. And the attic is unfortunately completely un-reachable.

So I ended up settling for a pair of very nice jeans, with a pair of black court shoes and a black top that has long sleeves made of a gauzy material, but off the shoulders with a bodice which you could undo to show your stomach if you wanted, I chose to leave it done up – I don't want the guests perving at me.

I asked the mirror Ned had given me for Christmas a few years ago to do my usual make-up. Then it dried my hair and gave me a side parting that caused voluptuous curls to constantly fall in my face. Normally it would irritate the hell out of me but right now I'm happy as long as it hides my face.

Finally finished I went to see Lottie who had obviously also given up on finding something not fitted, she settled for a low–cut sapphire blue shirt, the same colour as her eyes, a pair of tight jeans and some blue court shoes. The collar of her shirt was pulled up - her trade mark. Her make-up was similar to mine, except black kohl made her eyes stand out from her face, accentuating her striking appearance; her long raven black hair was poker straight and had a side-parting which caused it to frame her face.

"Hey Lils, I'm almost ready. Katie's already down stairs, she's not staying but she's waiting for us to say goodbye." Lottie put on a long silver necklace that would go as low as the cut of her shirt, after that we went downstairs.

Katie's parents had already flooed back home so Katie was just waiting for us in the hallway, "hey guys, I've got to go now. Mum and dad weren't too comfortable so they decided to go, but I wanted to say good bye," Katie smiled at us, flicking her wavy, dirty blonde hair out of her face.

Katie was one of those people that when you first looked at them you don't think they're that special, but the more you look at them the prettier they become until you think they're the prettiest person you have ever seen. It was something in the way her eyes sparkled and her smile was so ready with everyone. She's by far the most optimistic and grounded of the three of us.

"Traitor! You're abandoning us for the safety of your own home. Leaving us to the mercy of the people in this house, our only weapons being tight low-cut tops and Irish teas, champagne and maybe the odd vodka? How could you!" Lottie, always over-dramatic, just can't say a simple good bye, she has to embellish it until it's unrecognisable.

I decide to say bye with a hug and a simple "you lucky sod, you better be praying for us!" Katie just laughs and waves before jumping into the green flames and disappearing from sight.

"Ok, here's the game plan, Lots. You get a bottle of champagne and stash it in the second lounge, I'll get a couple of glasses, we make an appearance, smile, pretend we aren't uncomfortable in our clothes then run into the second lounge get pissed and hide for the rest of the day. What do you say?" I look at her expectantly; she looks straight back at me an eyebrow raised, I mean is it actually fair for someone to be striking, funny, intelligent and elegant? I don't think so.

"You've been practising this haven't you?" the corners of her mouth twitching slightly.

"Yes, why? Did I over do it?" I ask.

"No it's a brilliant idea Lils, now you go get the glasses and I'm off for the champagne. I'm modifying it slightly though. There is absolutely no we are getting pissed on one bottle… a bottle each however might just do the trick!" she winks and disappears, must go and find the glasses.

* * *

**Officially 16 hundred hours, New Years day. **

My brilliant idea didn't seem to be so brilliant after all. Well, the first bit worked, after Lottie returned we re-entered the "socializing room", as Newboobs calls it and was forced to put up with being stared at and forced to talk to a series of ancient beings who pose as the top of wizarding society but actually that is only a ploy to cover the fact that they are _the_ biggest perverts on the bloody planet.

I'm mean I can put up with people staring at me, I embarrass my self so much that I'm used to it now, but after I had my arse grabbed for the 15th time by someone who I'm pretty sure was alive in the middle ages I decided enough was enough, I quickly went to look for Lottie who had been cornered by what looked like three Egyptian mummies all telling her that "their son's had recently come of age and they're looking for a suitable bride"

Grabbing her we make a quick escape into the second lounge, found the bottles, popped the corks and forgot about such civilized things as glasses and started drinking it straight from the bottle. However our moment of peace was to be short lived.

No sooner had we settled ourselves down in our favourite chairs than we were joined by the Marauders and their fanatical following. Now I can handle old men looking me up and down, lets be honest they haven't got much life left in them, but when the Marauders do it, I wanted to crawl into my size 16 hoodie and never reappear.

Shifting uncomfortably under their gaze I glare at them, Lottie however decided to take a more verbal approach, "Olivia get you ruddy friends out of our bleeding lounge, we've had enough perverts for the day thank-you very much!"

The Marauders raised their eyebrows to the point where you can't see them any more, "Shut up _Charlotte_! Please, come in and sit down!" Olivia smiled politely at her friends and they all came and sat themselves down on the sofas. Groaning audibly I take a long swig of my Champagne and I am now going to scribble in this until I fall a sleep.

* * *

**6 o'clock pm**

I've just woken up and fortunately in my normal position, both my legs over one arm and my back resting against the other, head leaned against the back of the chair. I'm pretty sure all the circulation has been cut off from my legs, but at least I'm not flashing at anybody.

Lottie however doesn't sleep in such an elegant position. She's so much like a dog it's actually funny. She had one leg over the back of her chair and the other on an arm. Her head then rests on the actual seat, not very lady-like and gives anyone who looks at her an excellent view down the front of her top. I probably should wake her up. Grabbing a pillow I throw it at her and luckily it lands on top of her face. She takes one look at me and…

"AAAAAAHHHHHHH" she screams, falling off the chair and landing sprawled out on the floor, I don't believe it. When did Lottie decide to die her hair Florescent blue? "Lils hunny when did you decide to go platinum?"

"What? I didn't. When did you die your hair Florescent blue?"

"I didn't," Looking slightly amused she stands up and looks at herself in the mirror, I quickly follow suit, and sure enough my hair is such a fake colour blonde that I look like a hooker wearing a wig, I'm not quite sure whether to laugh or cry but one look at Lottie with Florescent blue hair quickly makes my decision. I burst out laughing. Lottie quickly joins in.

Pointing at her I manage to gasp out, "You look like a blueberry!"

"What you don't think it brings out the colour of my eyes?" She says sarcastically, "Besides a blueberry is far better than looking like Malibu Barbie, you look like a hooker with a wig on!" Suddenly, she clasps her hand over her mouth and stumbles backwards tripping and falls ever so un-elegantly onto the floor. Eyes wide and bursting with laughter she spat out, "I have a brilliant beyond brilliant idea!"

She had that look in her eye that means one thing. This is going to be fun! Whatever it is I am so game, "What?"

"We already have hooker hair right?" where was this is going? "so I'm thinking short skirts, tight tops, lots of makeup, clubs and a bet!" her eyes sparkling she looks at me, I can't help the maniacal grin that is spreading over my face.

"What's the bet?" I ask, grinning Lottie jumps to her feet and starts pulling me out of the lounge.

"Five galleons says that I get more propositions than you."

"You are so on, meet me in the hallway in and hour!" Running upstairs and into my room as fast as I can I quickly root through my wardrobe until I find a short leather skirt that could be mistaken for a belt, a top that is completely see through round the stomach and quickly grab a pair of fishnet suspenders, finding some black knee-high boots, and a denim jacket I start work on my makeup.

This time I black my eyes out, put on bright red lipstick, some dark blusher and foundation, I plaster my eye lashes with mascara to make them longer and black, I decided to leave my hair so my voluptuous Blonde curls still fall in my face, I look like the perfect slapper. Finally satisfied I go outside and wait for Lottie.

Lottie is already waiting for me, leaning against the wall she was wearing bright blue court shoes the same colour as her hair, black fishnet tights with holes in random places a tight black skirt, with a huge clasp, actually it could be a belt! A blue and black top that could have been painted on her, slashed in casual places around her stomach, it also showed off an awful lot of her cleavage and showed how skinny she was.

It reminded me how close to being anorexic Lottie had been last year, now however I'm glad to report that she can't get enough of food, however she never really looks like she's recovered properly. Any way her outfit is finished off with a leather jacket, makeup the same as mine and a cigarette sticking out from bright red lips, Neither of us really smoke but it goes with the role so I take the one she offers me and grin as I light it.

We walk down stairs carefully and get as far as the door before we heard, "Lottie Price and Lily Evans where are you going?" Ned's looking at us wide eyed and ever so slightly annoyed.

"Someone blessed us with this wonderful hair, so we figured seeing that we already have hooker hair we might as well finish off the theme, that's about right isn't it?" Lottie nods.

"Then we decided it would be funny to have a bet to see how many propositions each of us can get. It's about five galleons each at the moment feel free to join in. We'll let you know tomorrow who won," smiling charmingly at her brother Lottie turns around and climbs into the car after me.

* * *

**1 o'clock (am), Operation hooker finally finished.**

I definitely shouldn't have had that last shot. Everything seems to be spinning, and I know I'm not walking in a straight line, but by fuck that was scary. Fun to begin with but terrifying towards the end.

When Lottie and I got in the car we immediately opened a bottle of something, what it was I'm not completely sure but it was definitely alcoholic, so by the time we reached the bars we were slightly pissed.

We managed to get into the bars without any trouble and were immediately propositioned by two old guys, laughing we told them we were on a break but if they checked back later we might be available. We had a lot of breaks that night!

Getting drinks wasn't really a problem and we managed to get with a few fit guys, who just wanted a good time, however dressing like a whore does have its down sides.

I was just dancing with some random person when this big bald guy comes up behind me and propositioned me. Laughing I said in as flirtatious a voice as you can when you pissed out of your mind, "Sorry hunny I'm on a break," unfortunately that answer wasn't what he wanted.

"No your not, your coming with me," he grabbed me by my shoulder and started to drag me out of the bar. I was petrified at this stage and I had no idea where Lottie was, so I did the only thing I could think of.

Some how I managed to get myself free from his grip and ran towards the nearest table. Sitting down with a random group of people, I gushed out, "Please help me, this guy's really scaring me. Please help me!"

They looked at me completely startled by the appearance of a very drunk looking whore, suddenly the bald guy was behind me, he looked at me and smiled, "Come on love you're making a scene!" when I refused to get up he grabbed my chair and started to drag it towards the door.

Thankfully one of the guys sitting at the table stood up and pulled me out of the chair, "Look mate she obviously doesn't want to go with you so I think you should leave her alone." I stood behind him clinging to his arm gratefully.

The bald man looked at the tall guy who had stood up for me, and then over at his friends, before throwing the chair on the ground and walking towards the door. Giving the tall man and his friends a slurred thank you I ran off into the toilets to find Lottie, she wasn't there. Running around I finally found her in the corner sitting on a randomers knee.

"Lots we've got to go!" I said to her urgently.

"What? Why? What happened?" Lottie slurred, still smiling. In her drunken state she didn't notice how scared I was, with my mascara running slightly because I was almost crying.

"Nothing, nothing happened, can we please leave?"

"Yeh. Course we can if you want." she said standing up, and wobbling slightly in her three inch heels. We quickly got out of the bar and started walking to where a large line of taxis were waiting.

"There you are!" a gruff voice said behind me. A strong hand grabbed my arm in a vice like grip and started to drag me towards a waiting car.

"LOTTIE" I screamed as loud as I could. Lottie turned around frowning.

"Hey what are you doing?" she asked, when he didn't answer and just continued dragging me away. Lottie ran up behind me and started to pull me in the opposite direction.

He turned around and seizing my opportunity I kicked him as hard as I could in the balls, when he doubled over Lottie kicked him in the head. Free we ran as fast as we could to the nearest taxi where we jumped in and asked to be taken to Lottie's house.

The adrenaline from the sudden attack sobered us immediately.

Now we're back and at Lottie's order I told her everything. She was furious to the point where she wanted to go back and kill the bastard. I managed to talk her out of it.

We opened the door with a loud bang and Lottie stormed into the sitting room, me following slightly more sedately. Lottie immediately went to the booze cupboard and I grabbed two glasses. Just before we managed to get safely into the second sitting room Ned's loud angry voice echoed through the room and sighing we headed into the now empty socializing room, "Lottie, Lily where the hell have you been? We were scared out of our minds for you. We searched everywhere!" Looking around the room, I saw Ned and Charlie looking furious, Black was sitting there too nodding like a puppet.

I tried to steady myself and sat on the nearest thing to me whilst I mumbled "here we go again." Now I was safe I suddenly realised I was shaking badly and the tears I had held in earlier started to stream down my face. I looked at the ceiling to try to get them to stop.

Lottie mouthed "leave it" at her brother and thankfully Ned took her advice. She took a glass, slammed it down on the table, filled it with some vodka and sipped at it slowly. She opened her mouth; and looked at me with that look about her that asked 'can I tell him?' I shook my head, and put my face in my hands which I couldn't get to stop shaking.

So instead Lottie asked, "How many did you get?" I have the best friend – trying to distract me.

"22" I mumbled into my hands

She snorted, "You won!" suddenly she frowned at me the corners of her mouth twitching slightly, "You comfy there Lils?" she asked biting her lip.

"Not particularly. Why?" I asked genuinely confused

"You're sitting on Potter's knee!" Lottie muttered smiling at me

I could feel the look of horror spread across my face even before I jumped about a foot in the air. Mumbling an apology I flopped in to the opposite chair, checking this time that it was un-occupied. Tears started to roll down my face again and I could feel everyone looking at me, I covered my face with my hands and curled into a ball on the large armchair, just wanting to hide from the world.

Lottie came and stood in-front of me. Bending down so her face was close to mine she muttered, "Sorry", only then did it occur to me that Lottie might blame herself for letting me get into that situation, but right then I didn't care; I just wanted my bed and comfort from someone, someone to look after me.

Lottie smiled before saying quietly, "at least we know the bastard won't be-able to procreate!" I smiled, trust Lottie to know exactly what to say to make me feel better. She is definitely the best friend I could ever hope for.

"It wasn't your fault, Lots!" I said sincerely, opening my eyes so I could look at her.

She didn't answer but instead said, "Lets get you to bed, you need to sleep!" We went to our rooms, leaving the boys to wonder what had happened I guess. Lottie rejoined me so I could talk about it if I wanted to, I didn't, just wanting to forget. But in the end Lottie crashed at the end of my bed and for some reason it made me feel safer; as if I had a guard dog sleeping at the end of my bed.

* * *

**A/N:** Hey WOW I got a review from TWO people who I didn't know! Thank you soooooooo much you two are my new favourite people! Besides my Beta of course who is brilliant! Sorry this chapter took to long in coming but I've been revising like mad for my GCSE's which I have decided I am doomed to fail! Hopefully the next chapter won't take so long, and if you read my other story "A fine line between love and hate" it should be up-dated shortly! O my Beta: Tweeny Weeny, has a story up to called Fatal Incompatibility it's also a Lily and James and you should read it because she's a much better and much funnier writer than me! Any ways please R and R! Even if it's criticism because I need all the help I can get! Thank you lol Sirius Protégé.

**B/N: **(see what I did there – BETA's NOTE! – clever huh! Hehe) anyway the wait is also partly my fault I have had this for a week and have only just finished. Sorry.


	3. Chapter 3

_Oblivious_

**_Disclaimer_**: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine! Thanks to the over-active imagination of a 15 year old girl.

WARNING: there will be alcohol abuse and a lot of swearing in this fanfic.

Chapter 3

Waking up this morning was not fun. At some point during the night Lottie plonked her fat head on my stomach, making me to twist into a position I had previously thought was not humanely possible, I now can't move my head because of the giant crick in my neck. Lottie was not sympathetic.

And she calls herself my best friend.

This with the added complements of a hangover and the emotional drainage I now know comes specifically from sobbing one's eyes out in front of a room of people means I am now in a fantastic mood. Thank goodness the British can do sarcasm.

Oh dear Lord. Last night… Ned and Charlie are going to want explanations, if they're still here.

Oh my giddy aunt. I sat on Potters knee!

In a mini-skirt.

Help me.

I push Lottie off my bed and sit up, "Lottie gives me a look which should have killed anyone in a 10 mile radius. I, thankfully, am immune.

"O shut up and get dressed!" I mumbled not the slightest bit sympathetic; you wouldn't be either if you were me.

I decided to have a quick shower before I grabbed a pair of baggy jeans which somehow had made it from my trunk to my wardrobe and a black tank top. This coupled with a simple long sleeved green top and some trainers was about as much effort as I was willing to give today. Looking into the mirror I sighed with relief to see that my hair had returned to its original auburn colour.

Stumbling down the stairs I wonder into the kitchen and see the dark purple sludge in shot glasses that is Toddie's famous HOC. You've got to love house elves. I down it as fast as possible before putting the kettle on and start shoving some coffee granules into two mugs.

The HOC officially takes control; I'm now fully awake and humming slightly as I sit down at the table with the newspaper. Well, if I could find the newspaper that's what I'd be doing. Finally I spot it and take it from its position where it was standing up on the table.

Wait a minute.

Standing up on the table?

I look up timidly only to be met by four very inquisitive stares, "AAAHHH, When did you get here?"

"We said good morning to you about ten times Lils," Ned replied without his usual morning grin, which means he hasn't forgotten about last night.

Turning my attention to Black and Potter I stare at them for a few seconds before it registers that they shouldn't be there," What are you two still doing here?" I ask raising my eyebrows. I am at the moment trying not to blush.

Red is not a good colour on you Lils is for some reason the only thing I can think about.

It's only Potter, it's hardly like he's special.

This gets me to calm down enough to hear Potter's answer

"My parents had to go somewhere so we're staying here until school starts again," Potter replied looking slightly worried that I might break down into tears again.

"O right," I tried to sound enthusiastic, I really did. However there is only so much a girl can do when inside she is yelling "You have got to be kidding me! First I make a great prat of myself last night sitting on your knee and sobbing whilst flashing my underwear to the entire room, and now I find out that I'm stuck in your presence until school….?"

Can things get any worse? I swear that I must have done something seriously terrible in my past life in order to work up this much need for humiliation. Maybe I tried to outlaw chocolate. Or maybe I was behind the whole banning alcohol thing in America.

Thankfully, I was saved from having to make further conversation by Lottie. She stumbled into the counter and started saying things that she really shouldn't know. Her hair was in her face and I smiled when I saw what she was wearing; it's so typically Lottie that it practically makes me nostalgic – yes I know she's right here with me but you can be nostalgic in advance. You can be.

Lottie has this huge thing about air-texs. She has loads of the things in all different colours each with "Price # 5" on them. When I first came to live with her in second year she bought me a whole load of them for Christmas in all the colours of the rainbow. I never saw any of the t-shirts again after Boxing Day. She is absolutely bonkers. However it is quite endearing. Sometimes.

So Lottie bangs in wearing her black air-tex with "Price # 5" on the back in royal blue, a long sleeved blue and black striped top underneath. This combined with tight jeans and trainers is quite a contrast to what she was wearing last night.

Eventually she finds the HOC and handling the glass with probably too much familiarity downs it, before throwing the glass up in the air catching it behind her back and slamming it upside down in the sink. I frown at Lottie as I notice Potter and Black exchanging a look. Yes, one of _those_ looks: the mildly disapproving ones parents have perfected. I glance at Lottie to see if she noticed their presence I receive a curt nod back. I'll take that as a yes.

"Hogwarts' letters are here," Ned chucked them at us as he strolled into the kitchen.

"When do we go back to school?" Lottie asks. Really, after 6 years at the place she should have figured out the term times.

"We go back day after tomorrow"

"So Diagon Alley today then, what do you need to get?" I look at her in disbelieve,

"Lottie, I have all the same classes as you. We need all the same books. Look at your list."

"Alright, alright no need to be such a smart arse, when are we going?" I shrug and Lottie sighed, "Come on, we need to tell New…" she glances at Potter and Black, "Mother dearest that we're going to Diagon Alley."

Nodding I pick up my coffee and start to follow her,

"Oh and if you're going to Diagon Ally, Olivia and Alice need to go as well… as do these two. So you can all go together," I am going to kill Ned.

Lottie's obviously thinking the same thing, she takes one really hard look at Ned, "What's up?"

"What's up? What's up?" His voice has just risen a whole octave, either this isn't good or he's reverting to childhood, "You disappear last night dressed like whores. You then come back completely pissed. Lily bursts into tears and you appeared to be about to kill something." Lottie and I exchange a look, "Before" he practically screams, "Before you pour yourselves vodka and leave without an explanation!" This isn't good. At least the two Marauders look sufficiently uncomfortable.

"Right, so basically we're going to be supervised 24/7 until you calm down" Lottie growls,

"No, you are going to be supervised until you tell me what the fuck happened!" Ned roared.

"Well then you're going to be watching us for the rest of our lives, because what happened last night is staying with us till the day we bloody well keel over and die!" Lottie screamed back, she stormed out of the kitchen

Ned opened his mouth to retort at her retreating back but I cut in quickly,

"Look, I know we worried you Ned but what happened last night I never want to talk about again. We always tell you what's important" Go mature Lily, "so for god's sake don't be so up-tight," Ok, not so mature.

My words leave the room in silence; Ned throws his paper on the table with more force than necessary and leaves. Charlie looks at us, "He'll calm down now that he knows how you feel, but you sure… you sure you're alright?"

A series of sarcastic remarks fly through my head, swallowing them back I settle for, "Yes, now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go wake up the Brats and we'll leave as soon as they're ready" I quickly leave the Kitchen in search of Lottie.

After rudely waking up the Brats and unfortunately telling them that we're going to Diagon Alley with 1/2 of the Marauders I met Lottie, Black and Potter in the Sitting room waiting for the Brats and Newboobs to come downstairs.

Whoever said silence is golden was really speaking out of their arse. I can tell you that without a shadow of a doubt that the silence was so unbelievably thick in the sitting room you could have cut it with a knife. In fact it probably would have broken the knife.

The Marauders obviously felt really uncomfortable in our presence, not that I can blame them. After watching the two sit there exchanging looks for forever I decided to give up altogether and explain something properly instead.

Well I've been going on and on about how shy Lottie, Katie and I are. I know I now seem like a complete hypocrite because I got pissed out of my head and dressed up as a hooker before going clubbing. Not something you would really imagine a shy little girl doing is it?

Truthfully, I honestly couldn't care less how I acted around Lottie, Katie, Ned, Charlie, the Brats and Lottie's dad and stepmother. They're my family and they won't judge me, or at least the ones who would _cough-brats and newboobs-cough _already have and nothing I do would change their opinion.

At Hogwarts people judge you, on the way you look, what you wear, what you say. The amount of times I've heard someone say to me, "Shut up, mudblood." or "how would you know, you're muggleborn?" When I was younger this was enough to make me shut up for life, scared that if I opened my mouth I'd be ridiculed. Katie and Lottie didn't have exactly the same problem. Katie is a pure blood but she's poor and so many people treat her like slime on their shoes.

Lottie had it somewhat different; she comes from a rich pureblood family and well known for its arrogance and confidence. You'd imagine she'd fit right in but people were jealous of her. When she arrived she was somewhat aloof from everyone else and so many people decided she was an arrogant bitch and left it at that.

We didn't actually become friends until the Christmas holidays of first year. Lottie and I had settled into a routine - she'd run around the lake and I'd do lengths in it. For some reason I've never been bothered by the Giant Squid, I believe it's actually lonely.

It was the third day when we talked to each other. Well she handed me my towel and we started talking. I remember being so scared that she was going to make fun of me or call me a mudblood that when she didn't I was so grateful I immediately invited her to come study with me in the library.

So that was the beginning of a _beautiful friendship_, we spent the whole day together in the common room as we were having too much fun to make it to the library.

It wasn't until later that evening that we met Katie. Most of the Gryffindors had gone home so the seats by the fire were free, and that's when we saw this little, mousy haired girl, nose in a book, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible.

We started talking to her and by the end of the Holidays the three of us were close friends. Luckily none of us have ever regretted it.

Even though we were friends we kept our heads down, any jokes were private and we were generally invisible which was just the way we like it, however at home, we like to be noticed and to be included in what's going on. Yet remind me that next time I come home and see random popular people around I should keep my head down – it's not worth the trouble.

"Can I floo Remus and Peter to see if they can meet us at Diagon Alley?" Black enquires finally breaking the silence.

"What? Oh, yeah it's in the urn over the fire place," Lottie snaps out of her day dream pretty fast.

After having a fairly animated conversation, Black finally brings his head out of the fireplace just as the Brats, their faces plastered in make-up, waltz down the stairs with their mother behind them.

"The girls tell me you're going to Diagon Alley. I want you all to stick together," she shoots a glare in our direction. We look back eyes wide with innocence, "No staying out until late at night and then bunking with your brother, have I made myself clear?" we all nod, "I mean it Lottie!"

"I didn't say anything,"

"Your look said it all. Now have a nice time!" Rolling her eyes Lottie throws some floo powder in the fire and disappears from sight.

I really hate floo, I mean really hate it. Why would anyone want to spin around in green flames and then fall out of a fireplace? Mental if you ask me, I think the person who invented it could either apparate and so hardly had to use it or just enjoyed feeling nauseous.

Anyway we all finally arrive, and everyone else seems completely fine about the floo. Gits. I'm sure I look green.

"Right well see you guys later," Lottie smiles happily as we start to walk away.

"Wait mum said we all have to stick together," Olivia just can't let us go, doesn't she understand that we're very keen to leave before rest of the Marauders arrive so we can avoid any other possibly embarrassing situations.

"Well we won't tell if you won't," I say still walking backwards.

"Well we will," Alice immediately jumps at the opportunity to make our lives difficult.

"Olivia, Alice come here," Lottie motions them forward and hesitantly they come towards her, Lottie whispers something to them.

"O you wouldn't dare!" Olivia exclaims suddenly.

"O but I would," Lottie replies ginning evilly. They turn on their heels and walk back towards the Marauders without a backwards glance. I actually feel quite sorry for those guys; the look they shot us when the Brats returned really was nothing short of a cry for help.

Suckers.

"Right, now we've been everywhere and got everything so… what do you want to do now? Taking into consideration that we can't go home until the Brats come back?"

"I don't know. Do you want an ice cream?" I shrug

"That sounds good to me." We sit down in Fortescue's and order two large ice creams. Eating it slowly I revel in the fact that it doesn't taste the slightest bit alcoholic. I mean just because I drink a lot doesn't mean I enjoy alcohol. I actually hate the fact that I drink it so much to keep happy.

"Lots, what was it you used to blackmail the Brats?"

"Are you sure you want to know? It's rather disturbing."

"Lottie Price if I you keep this juicy piece of information to yourself for much longer I swear I'll kill you!"

"Well as my life is at stake…" I glare at her, "Fine! It was that night when we had just got back from town and Dad got back at the same time, do you remember?"

"O yeah and we had to get changed into pyjamas in the laundry room. Wasn't that the first time you slept in boxers?"

Lottie nods, "Yes, but you see these clothes were a little apart from all the rest so I assumed they were Ned's. Then we slurred to my dad the fact that we wanted some water and then went to bed, well next day when I went downstairs Ned had come to see if we were 'ok' being the lovely big brother that he is and asked me 'who Sirius was.'"

"He asked you 'who Sirius was.'" I repeated stupidly,

"The boxers I was wearing had 'Sirius' in large white letters over the backside,"

Lottie now grinned.

"What?" I ask in disbelief.

"It turns out that it wasn't Ned's laundry that I'd stolen. The clothes were the Brats'. I went back to investigate, and it turns out that they had nicked a pair of boxers from each Marauder! It took me a while to convince Ned that I wasn't shagging anybody but that the Brats had stolen the Boxers…"

"They stole whose boxers?" A voice suddenly asks from behind us, I'm not even going to bother to turn around, just take one guess who it is?

Black and Potter pull up a chair turning them around so they can rest their arms on the seatback, "Where are Lupin and Pettigrew?" I have to admit I was wondering that myself.

"Huh? O neither of them could come," Black said sadly, "We've been stuck with Olivia and Alice all day. We finally managed to get rid of them whilst they were trying on dress robes," Both of the boys winced visibly at this, looking at Lottie I can see that she's finding it very hard to keep a straight face, I better shove some ice cream in my mouth before I burst out laughing. Great excuse right?

"Anyway whose boxers did they steal?" Potter leans forward and his intentions become entirely clear.

"And here was little old me thinking that it was only girls who like to gossip," I reply sarcastically, I hope he picks up on the insinuation about his manliness – or lack thereof.

"Usually we can't stand the stuff but occasionally it offers up something we can use." He grins in reply

"So the Marauders gossip?" Lottie goads,

"Of course we don't gossip!" Black looks positively insulted.

"Girlfriends however usually do and they often tell us some very interesting things about some very interesting people," Potter is still grinning at us. The git, if he thinks he knows anything about us…

"Never heard anything about you two though, or that friend of yours, what's her name? She sits at the same table as Remus in the library."

"Katie?"

"Yeah that's the one, never heard anything about you three," Potter looks a bit miffed; I knew he was bluffing about knowing something about us. What's the betting he tries to rely on charm to get out of it?

"You'd think we would notice girls like you," money to Evans, Potter is relying on charm!

"Thank you." Lottie gushes, batting her eyelashes and leaning forwards, both of the boys obviously think they've won her over and lean closer "It's too bad we're not gossips isn't it," The smile is instantly wiped from their faces.

"Please help us; I can't take your stepsisters for much longer!" Black is trying to pull puppy dog eyes; it is not a flattering look.

"Why?" Ok, I know exactly why but that doesn't mean Lottie, Potter AND Black can stare at me like I'm a pink and purple polka dot grape from Mars!

"What? Just… just because?"

"Well, yes that really summed it up eloquently – thank you Potter for clearing that up."

Lottie isn't even bothering to hide her amusement at the frustrated duo. She's got an eyebrow raised and is smiling and I can't seem to stop laughing. I know everyone goes on about how _hot_ the Marauders are and I agree with them, it's the bit about how _irresistible_ they are that I don't agree with. Then again at the moment I'm beginning to doubt how clever they are. But it is true they have no competitors when it comes to making themselves look stupid in front of Lottie and I; I mean they could make an ape on a rampage, because it has yet again been forced into a pink ballerina costume, stop and laugh just by attempting to pull puppy dog eyes. Someone _needs_ to tell them how constipated they look.

"We'll pay you five gallons if you help us!"

"You're that desperate? The mighty Marauder's are on the run from two girls?" They glower at me but I smirk and ignore them,

Lottie nods once at me though so maybe, just this once, we'll help them out. I'll do anything to stop these pitiful pathetic faces.

"Ok." From the relief on their faces you'd think we'd just saved them from a fate worse than death.

"Thanks. So what annoys them enough to keep them away?"

"Hang on a second, cough up." I hold out my hand alongside Lottie's and together the Marauders grudgingly hand over five gallons.

"What annoys them? Well animals, books, anything remotely intellectual. Lils, have you got any ideas?"

"I think you've covered most of it,"

"We've tried all of that, I even pretended I had a pet snake and Olivia just gushed about how Snakes make wonderful shoes" Black nearly growled with frustration. "What really irritates the hell out of them?" Lottie and I fall silent for a moment as we both think deeply about what the Brats hate most, finally I burst out excitedly

"Us!" My satisfied smirk disappears the minute I see the look on the Marauders' faces, the sinking feeling is not stopped by Lottie banging her head on the table.

"Really? Then I guess we'll just have to spend the rest of the day around you two!" Potter leans back and his eyes are simply dancing with mischief.

_A/N: Hey guys… hope you liked the chapter. It's kind of boring compared to the last one but I swear it will get better! Thanks to all who reviewed! Sorry about the long wait but my BETA has had this for about 3 weeks and she has only just finished checking it! Wish me luck with the rest of my GCSEs! Thanks so much for reading; I would really appreciate it if you reviewed as well!_

_Anyway next chapter they are back at Hogwarts, and you get to find out what happened the rest of the day in Hogsmeade! Well you know to R &R_

_LOL _

_Sirius Protégé _


	4. Chapter 4

_**Sirius protégé**_

_Oblivious _

**_Disclaimer_**: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine! Thanks to the over-active imagination of a 16 year old girl.

WARNING: there will be alcohol abuse and a lot of swearing in this fanfic.

_It makes no sense to me but it seems that when we fall that's when we land perfectly – Natalie Imbruglia _

Chapter 4

AH! We're finally back from sodding Diagon Alley and joy of joys we're soaking wet, have mascara streaming down our cheeks, my nice white t-shirt has gone decidedly transparent and all because of Bloody Potter and Black refusing to leave us alone!

I have never met two people who are so annoying and so damn…conniving. Once those two had decided to come with us for "protection" Lottie and I tried acting like we normally do in school; we kept our heads down and ourselves to ourselves.

Potter and Black were _not _amused. So after a somewhat strained conversation in which Lottie and I gave purely one word answers Potter and Black came up with their scheme. The two irritating, infuriating, nauseating (you get the picture) little sods started to make some rather personal comments about us. Obviously this was so they could piss us off enough to make us act normally, or what they were used to at least. The truly horrifying thing is I DIDN'T NOTICE UNTIL NOW!

Basically we just stalked along in front, trying to keep our heads down when they started whispering horrible insinuations about us,

"Do you think they only speak when they're pissed?"

"Don't know mate, maybe they've just got a hangover, they were pretty pissed last night,"

"They were more than pissed, Evans was a mess." I was about to slaughter Potter but I guess I thought he should have a chance to redeem himself. Lottie was looking at me in the way she looks when she's feeling particularly protective of people she obviously didn't share my view that he should get a second chance.

"What is wrong with Price?" Black asks out of the blue, sneaking a look at Lottie – which neither of us missed, "Does that girl ever eat? She looks like a bloody stick insect… she probably drinks instead of eats!"

"Evans is just the same - gaunt as well!" Potter agreed, whilst Black nodded soberly. "Funny you know" Potter continued "I never had them down for the kind of Barbie doll you know? Always eating salads, always hungry, worried about the latest fashion you know?"

"Like Olivia and Alice!" Black suddenly exclaimed.

"Yeah!" Potter smiled and nodded at his friend.

Lottie's jaw dropped and my eyes felt like they were going to pop out of my head, Lottie looked at me and mouthed 'Madam Malkins!' I grinned and nodded, hopefully Olivia and Alice would still be there and we could off load Potter and Black before we murdered them.

Our luck was out, so, in a feat of incredible desperation, we spent as long as we could in that awful shop looking at robes… something both Lottie and I find extremely boring!

It was on the way out that Lottie finally snapped; driven mad by the gross untruths and awful insults Black and Potter were spewing so blatantly in front of us and the hour of intense boredom we had just spent in the stuffiest shop known to mankind Lottie, understandably, snapped.

Potter and Black had bought some chips and both Lottie and I were quite hungry. We were walking around the park at the end of Diagon Alley, when the final straw was uttered,

"You know you'd expect Ned Price's sister to be relatively good at Quidditch wouldn't you? I wonder what went wrong there." Potter suddenly asked Black.

_That_ was a big mistake. Lottie is almost as good as Ned on the Quidditch pitch and they have frequent "ego flights" during the holidays when they play one on one to see who is the better player.

"Maybe Price has a mutation in her gene pool where the Quidditch skills are generally found." Black replied.

"Oh right…"

"Would you two shut up?" Lottie screamed, whirling around and glaring at them. Potter and Black had at least the dignity to look surprised, "I could beat my brother in a game of Quidditch with my eyes closed and I'm not an ano-bleeding-rexic. Finally Lily and I are not bloody alcoholics, but if we were, it sure as hell would be _none_ of your business." With that she nicked Black's chips, chomping steadily through the packet as he breathing returned to normal and sharing the warm fries with me.

"Do you mind? Those are my chips," Black still had that look of shock on his face,

"I really would never have guessed." Lottie replied as both of us stuffed our faces.

"Give them back." Black cried childishly whilst he tried to grab his chips back,

"No!"

"Why?"

"Because, they don't taste nice if they're your own!" Lottie grinned

"Give them back."

"No!" Black lunged and Lottie leapt out of the way. Black tried to chase her but he didn't manage to catch her until long after she'd finished his chips.

"I can't believe you did that!" Black looked mournfully at the empty chip packet.

"What? That she outran you or that she ate your chips?" I ask impishly, stealing one of Potter's chips for good measure. The poor guy tries to glare at me, "Potter, don't glare, it makes you look like a monkey"

Black looked stunned and Potter was rapidly rearranging his facial expression, I smile charmingly before jumping up on to the small wall and started walking along it behind Lottie.

"What are you doing?" Potter asks curiously,

"Practising for when I'm tall." I know it was a stupid thing to say but I was actually taller than the 6 ft giants who had latched themselves to my best friend and me for survival.

"You're very odd you know that?"

"Why? Because she called you a monkey or because she's small?" Lottie asked curiously.

"Er, both" he declared with a grin.

"Are you discriminating against small people?" I asked accusingly, glaring at him as he perched himself on the wall.

"Yes!" he said simply, not the teeniest bit bashful or shy.

"You arrogant worm."

"I'd prefer to be arrogant than to be small." For that he was going in the lake! Therefore, for some coincidence I slipped, pushing Potter dearest into the lake, a flawless plan until he grabbed my ankle and I was pulled in too.

Finally we arrived home, soaking wet, smelling of pond water and (though I don't want to admit it) laughing helplessly. It seems Potter and Black aren't too bad (somebody shoot me). They're arrogant and chauvinistic, but at least they're _funny_, arrogant and chauvinistic.

**Sunday morning returning to Hogwarts**

I'm feeling rather guilty at the moment. There is a reason but you know, it's a long story and you really probably don't want to hear it. I really shouldn't feel guilty seeing as I did nothing wrong. Unless you call acting like I normally do at school wrong. Lottie and I are quiet and subdued at school. There's nothing wrong with that, no, absolutely nothing.

Okay so maybe we should have waited until we were on the train until before _reverting _to our "school-personalities" so Potter and Black didn't feel quite so uncomfortable. Suddenly having the people you saw dress up as hookers become silent, self-conscious girls. Yeah, I guess that could make two people slightly awkward.

I don't understand why I feel so guilty. Hopefully I'll regret it when I get back to Hogwarts and the Marauders pull some highly embarrassing prank showing that we didn't faze them at all, they probably will ignore us completely, forget our names.

The worst part of this feeling is that I have to feel guilty for Lottie too. I mean the girl is hopeless! Within moments of the train she had declared that she felt kind of bad and then, before I could even agree with her, she fell asleep. Wonderful, so now I'm burdened with her guilt as well, no wonder I can't sleep…

I would wake her up, you know, shake her, shout her name, find an alarm clock, but (unfortunately) there are only two things in the whole world that wake her up and, due to being stuck on a train, both are completely un-available. A) Her need for a morning run - already fulfilled and B) Coffee - which unfortunately there is a lack of.

So I'll just talk to Katie… who had disappeared! Wait I bumped into her on my way back from the prefects meeting she was going to the loo. I wonder what's happened to her. I think I'll go look…

Hang on, is that the trolley lady coming…oh, I can smell those pumpkin pasties already. Well Katie's a big girl; she can take care of herself besides the trolley lady has coffee. I better buy Lottie a cup; she gets a little bit annoyed if there isn't any. By little bit I mean has a certain tendency to throw things, heavy things, at anyone she perceives to have been involved in keeping the coffee from her.

Okay Operation… Wake Up Lottie.

Wafting, wafting, coffee under Lottie's nose. 5…4…3…2…1 and…BANG! Just as I suspected our poor, coffee addicted subject has just fallen off the seat!

"I smell Coffee!" I suppose I should feel upset that the first thing she says every morning never has anything to do with 'Good morning, Lily, thank you for helping me to wake up, you're such a good friend.' Instead I merely said,

"I know. Here you go,"

"Where's Lily?" Lottie is defiantly not very aware yet…

"I'm here Lots, Katie however has disappeared."

"That's what I meant! What do you mean she's disappeared? She was in here with us and then…

"I've no idea. But I did see her going to the loo on my way back from the prefects meeting."

"Lils… you know that Lupin's your fellow Gryffindor prefect?"

"Yes Lottie I was aware of that!"

"Well Katie's rather fond of him isn't she?" Oh no. Lottie did not just suggest that, did she? I mean the idea that Katie ditched us for the Marauders is just absurd! Shy little Katie? No.

"Lottie Price you better not be suggesting what I think you are."

"Um… Maybe it depends on what you think I'm suggesting," I hate that shifty look she has on,

"You're suggesting that she ditched us for the Marauders aren't you." I said severely.

"No, who do you think I am? I was merely suggesting that maybe she was high jacked by Olivia or Alice or someone similar who might want to make fun of her whilst she passed Lupin on the way to the loo." She doesn't seem to realise that adding "suspecting Katie of abandonment" to my list of things to feel guilty over is not improving my mood,

"Lottie it would have been more believable if you'd said the Marauders high jacked her because they wanted someone to save them from Olivia and Alice." Wait I hear voices. One's Katie's and the others are… she did not.

She wouldn't have.

Couldn't have.

So much for shy little Katie. At least my theory was right, victory jig.

**Hogwarts girl's dorm… safe at last!**

Well my first thought that the Marauders were completely unfazed by the rapid change in behaviour from Lottie and I was in-fact correct. Actually they didn't really notice us at all - just like usual. They started talking about Quidditch and playing exploding snap. Using our compartment only as a refuge not really for the occupants, which is really a good thing? I guess. I do not feel used.

So moving on to…the start of term prank which was really quite spectacular:

They Married Snape and Regulus Black together.

It was a lovely wedding. No, really, imagine Snape in a large, white, puffy wedding dress whilst Regulus stands in front of an impromptu alter, dressed in a black spandex tux, about to be married by a horrified Lucius Malfoy. The Slytherin Quidditch team dressed as the choir, singing a collection of hopelessly catchy songs,

"_Here comes the bride, _

_Snivillus the Snide,_

_With Junior Black as well, _

_Don't they look just swell._

_Both are slimy sneaks, _

_Slytherins and geeks._

_Let's hope that Snape's nose,_

_Drives dear Reggie to some…"_ At this point Dumbledore coughed loudly,

Rudolfus Lestrange's speech as chief bridesmaid was glorious, truly touching

"_I have to admit that I never thought I would ever see a couple so right for each other. We can only pray to find some one as greasy as Snape or as generally odious as Black spending the rest of their lives together – it insures they don't have to hang around with us._"

Of course, shouting over the din of Slytherin singing and the hysterical laughter of the other houses was Sirius, the other Black, shouting he was pleased that dear Reggie and his sweet thing were 'out of the closet.'

Well, we always knew that Sirius was odd.

It's good to be back at Hogwarts. I've lost that feeling that I'm not where I'm meant to be and feel at home – with all the good that means for my liver! I no longer have the pressure of trying to look happy all the time.

In an odd way at Lottie's house I show one side of me more than the other while at Hogwarts I show the other side: the one where we're sober. This is really us, which is rather worrying because we're quite boring. I mean we have fun and laugh a lot and we've been called mad on more than one occasion. Well by Professor Slughorn - he's under the impression that I'm a fun, nice, out going girl.

Which is true.

Sometimes.

Actually when I think about it, we don't really change at school _that _much. We just do all the loud and embarrassing things at night when everyone else is in bed.

And thinking about it… I may have been exaggerating when I said that we really didn't have _any _friends. I mean Olivia and Alice and others in their group, or posse, or whatever, who hang around with the Marauders do bully us, or at least actively ignore us (if that is even possible) but there is a kind of underground network of friends that come from all houses. As if all the rejects from all the houses decided that instead of staying on our own we'd join together.

Generally we're not noticed, I mean there are exceptions, Tim, the Head Boy is a friend of ours, part of the reject group because he's a Blood traitor. He dated Lottie. Out of all the relationships the three of us have had that one stands out the most in my mind because

A) He wasn't Lottie's usual type

B) Its one of the few amicable break ups she's ever had

And of course there's Alice Prewitt. Alice is in our dorm, she's not part of the reject group but doesn't really fit in with the stereotype "Miss Popularity" making her a drifter. There are a few of them in each house. Alice is enormously sweet and can be witty when she wants too; she's also easily the prettiest girl in our year.

Nat Jones is the other dorm mate (I use that term loosely) and she's full of the pure blood snobbery. In my esteemed opinion she should have been put in Slytherin.

**Monday morning.**

Well the lake was particularly cold this morning making it amazingly refreshing. Of course we're early to breakfast, which is lucky when we see they have my absolute favourite ever – PANCAKES!

Lottie of course only has eyes for the coffee pot. I think I can safely say Lottie will never feel alone with a cup of coffee in her hand.

As always pancakes mean one thing: Pancake Race! It's an odd and often extremely disgusting tradition the four of us have; we have a race to see who can eat five pancakes in the least amount of time.

Alice only attempts half heartedly because she's too busy laughing at the rest of us, Katie tries to do it keeping her 'dignity intact' and Lottie's mouth just isn't big enough. So step up the champion…ME!

"Okay, I've got my coffee. Are we ready?" Lottie's eyes are shining, "I'm going to beat you this time Lils!" I can't help but laugh, Lottie wouldn't be able to beat me even if she used magic.

"Okay. Ready…. Set…. go!"

The trick with high speed pancake eating, and you're listening to an expert here, is not to eat them one by one. Instead, stuff the whole lot into your mouth at once and chew like crazy. You look like a chipmunk for a while _but_ you end up winning.

"I win." I shriek, Lottie's looking quite put out – but the effect is ruined by the half-eaten pancake protruding from her mouth.

"Pancake race again huh?" Where did Tim come from? And why is Sarah not with him? Tim and Sarah have been dating for a while now and actually owe Lottie for getting them together; it's extremely rare for them to be separated. Tim had been in a race with someone else to get her to go out with him. He didn't find out until later on that it was Sirius Black.

Lottie pulled a few strings and planted it in Olivia's mind that Sirius Black was after her.

In the end Black spent so much time running away from Olivia that he didn't have time to chase Sarah, which left the way to a surprised and extremely happy Tim. Lottie had a spring in her step for days because she "successfully played a prank" on a Marauder. A great triumph for the underdogs.

The funniest bit is that Olivia still thinks Black likes her and that was a year ago.

Good Lord that was also the time Potter asked me out. I'd forgotten about that. That scared me, of course, everyone knew about the bet he had with Black to see how many people he could get to go out with him in a fortnight, so I don't know why he was so shocked I said no.

"You should really eat that you know?" Tim's obviously trying not to laugh as he catches sight of the half eaten pancake still in Lottie's mouth.

"I should really get to charms, now or I'll be late!" Alice says quickly and disappears,

"What do you mean; the rest of the school isn't even up yet! We have at least half an hour until charms," Lottie frowns,

"I know, I have to talk to Professor Flitwick about my tutor, I'd like to change him."

"Who do you have?" Katie is as always curious.

"Frank Longbotton!"

"I thought you liked Frank?"

"Oh no I do! I like him a lot! It's just well he's part of _that_ group and he's hardly ever alone and we always get interrupted, I like spending time with him but I really do need to have some tutoring where I actually learn something!" Alice's is rather red after admitting she likes Frank but I can see where she's coming from and sympathise with her immensely.

**Gryffindor tower, girl's dorm **

I'm hiding in the girl's dorm. Not just because I feel like it but because it is a matter of life and death, albeit a funny one.

You see after breakfast we followed Alice to charms, sitting in our usual seats. About 2 minutes before the bell rang; the Marauders and their entourage came in, along with Frank Longbottom and his group.

We were meant to be learning a very powerful lifting charm and luckily it didn't take us very long to master, so the three of us were just sitting there talking about nothing in particular.

Anyway Olivia and her friends were sitting around the Marauders, who were directly in front of us.

She was boasting and flirting, but then she started saying things about Lottie. She told everybody about the death of her mother and why I came to live with them as if she didn't know we were behind her.

"Well" Olivia started, "you know that Lily Evans, the one that lives with us, even though she has a perfectly lovely family of her own somewhere." I gasped in shock,

"And Lottie! Well I don't know just what to do with her," her voice literally dripping with fake concern, "She's started drinking you know, both of them have! I thought it was bad enough in fourth year when Lottie…"

I honestly have no idea how Olivia got so high in the air. I can sincerely say that I did not practise a lifting charm on her to make her shut up before Lottie snapped her in half.

Well Lottie definitely did not join in the fun by _accidentally_ transfiguring her hair into two horns and causing her to sprout a devil's tail. We both solemnly swear that we have no idea how the words _"Horny Devil!"_ started floating above her in bright red smoke.

Those Marauders huh! No respect for students.

Well needless to say everyone was in hysterics, with the exception of little Professor Flitwick., who yelled at the Marauders to let her down, however before the Marauders could deny it being them Olivia dropped to the ground, all signs of spell work on her evaporating. Professor Flitwick was so surprised that the _Marauders_ actually did what he'd asked of them that he sent them to see McGonagall with out listening to any of their protests.

Unfortunately, we have a suspicion that the Marauders know it was us, I mean, wasn't us. Therefore – I hide in the dorm.

On a brighter note, Frank Longbottom looked awfully annoyed when he came out of charms after Professor Flitwick had talked to him. I have a feeling he's far more attached to Alice than she knows.

A/N: Hey guys sorry this took so long! Its just I had GCSE's and then the Harry Potter book came out… and I guess I just got side tract plus I had serious writers block!

Okay I know not a lot happens in this chapter, but it's better than my last one! I'm not quite sure what happening next chapter, but I have a feeling they'll have a run in with the Marauders or something just as cliché… nah I'll try and prevent the cliché's as much as possible!

And guys PLEASE Review! I have a hit list now I know how many people are reading so please, please review! I need all the helpful criticism I can get! And I really like to know what you think!

Thanks a lot! Sirius Protégé


	5. Chapter 5

_**Sirius protégé**_

_Oblivious _

**_Disclaimer_**: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine! Thanks to the over-active imagination of a 16 year old girl.

WARNING: there will be alcohol abuse and a lot of swearing in this fanfic.

"Friends are those who bail you out of jail. BEST friends are those that are sitting next to you saying, 'Damn! That was fun!'"

Chapter 5

**Potions lesson…**

You'd think that avoiding the Marauders would be easy right? You'd be forgiven for imagining that four popular guys with their entourage would be easy to spot a mile away, you'd also be wrong.

I now know why they're so good at pulling pranks and also feel immensely jealous of their ability to appear out of no where. Not that I'm particularly pleased that they have this particular skill, we _are _in a life and death situation: the old "run into the Marauders and you're dead" ploy. Well, I imagine it is an old ploy if you're Snape.

Oh God! I have something in common with Snape. Worse. Both I _and _my best friends have something in common with Snape. We're too young and attractive to be in the same position as, as, uh. I am (reluctantly) sympathising with Snape, someone shoot me now for feeling pity for the Lord of Slime and Slithering.

So back to the point; avoiding the Marauders is not, by any means, going well. The distressing thing is I don't believe they are making any effort to find us, I mean why would they bother?

AH! Snap back to reality Lily, Potions, we are in POTIONS!

Is my potion meant to be this colour? It looks awfully _different_ to everyone else's. Hmmm…Lily Evans Master of Improvisation. I am thinking up a lot of titles today maybe… Professor Slughorn, Supreme Arse Kisser.

Ah, right, concentrate…what is this? Er Drag… Dragon… Dragon scales, right now for the instructions.

…_Add 3 dragon scales at 3 minute intervals stirring anticlockwise 5 times a minute, repeat this instruction 3 times… _

Bollocks, I haven't the time for that. Okay, well just tip nine scales into the potion, stir 5 times anticlockwise. Hmmm…maybe a couple of clockwise ones too, just to mix it up a bit.

Right, next step, Mandrake Root; doesn't salt make it more potent? Wow! My potion had gone a really nice shade of sapphire blue!

But everyone else's is lilac…

Don't panic, next instruction:

…_cut up and scrape the juice from the inside of the shell, after 10 minutes add the skin and stir clockwise…_

Right, and somebody would actually think to do that because? Anyway wouldn't you get more juice if you just squished it?

Right where's a squisher?

Lottie thinks I've gone mad – it didn't stop Peter Pettigrew from handing me a squisher though. (Yes, they are next to us in class, sigh)

Okay, skin off, go LILY! I have previously discovered that if you don't skin these blighters before squishing them with a, well, squisher then it takes forever picking the dregs of skin out of the horrible green pulp. Your hands also retain a horrible smell of mouldy cat food for weeks afterwards. Ew, it's slimy and slippy and…

Woopsy-daisy…

I just dropped the whole thing into the potion.

Let's have a moment of concentrated swearing:

"…"

"…"

"…"

Continuing on I add the skin and then stir in the wrong direction, stir in the opposite direction twice as fast in the naïve hope that this would actually counteract the numerous mistakes I made in this potion.

However, I think it's over. Right, well Katie's potion appears to be swearing at her, if I were Slughorn I would be impressed with the tenor of its voice considering it's only a measly potion. So I'm doing better than Katie, but everybody else seems to have a lilac potion – maybe I was further ahead than I thought? Well Black and Potter's is the same gorgeous sapphire blue that my potion was moments ago and Snape's is…

Well gee wiz and holy moly, Snape's is exactly the same as mine. SCORE! Full marks for Lily the Queen of Potions; oh right, we don't boast about that kind of thing do we?

Katie's potion has mercifully fallen silent and is now a sort of greyish colour whilst Lottie's appears to have had nothing done to it all lesson. Strange. Potions is one of Lottie's favourite classes and though not her best she normally works hard and finishes the same time as me so for her to give no effort at all is definitely abnormal behaviour. I'm sure there's a good excuse though, something irritating and positively evil most likely.

"I think I'm done."

"Are you sure?" Lottie whispers back as Slughorn oozes past us,

"It looks like Snape's."

"Good." And with that Lottie charmed her potion to look like mine.

'Lottie! Change it back, what if Professor Slughorn wants to try some?' Katie is hissing furiously, some people obviously thought her potion was starting up again because the Marauders and Slytherins (don't tell them I lumped them together like that!) are looking at us strangely. Of course by strange for the Slytherins I mean in the way someone who had never seen a Slytherin might think their ways are barbaric – personally I never get tired of the 'I'm-going-to-torture-you-and-any-random-kittens-who-happen-to-be-around' glares.

"If he tries some," Lottie explains after some thought, "one of two things will happen: He'll either get knocked unconscious like he's meant to or by some happy miracle he'll die a painful death.'" Maybe I should be more worried about getting on Lottie's bad side than on the Slytherins?

"Right now stop what you're doing. Put your utensils down and let's see what we have…" Slughorn is at the moment sliding around the room like an overgrown snail "Excellent work all of you! Wonderful work Miss Evans, Mr Snape, Mr Potter and Miss Price, 10 marks each to your respective houses for managing to finish." He pauses in smug satisfaction for a moment and then says "Now who's shall I try? Mr Snape would you -?"

"I think you should try some of Miss Price's, Professor."

I think Sirius Black is a complete nut job, that's what _I_ think.

Lottie just smiles broadly and hands him a full flask of the stuff. Is she INSANE? Sure, she hangs around with me but honestly endangering the life of a teacher – even one who is a slug in more than name?

Dear Lord Almighty, Jesus, Joseph and Mary.

My best friend is a murderer.

A murderess.

She fed Professor Slughorn poison.

He just keeled over and…

Wait isn't that what the potion's meant to do?

It's meant to knock the person unconscious, and only for a short period of time as well (which seems pointless to me.) Why bother spending hours over a cauldron when you can just get a nice metal pole and whack the person over the head?

"Lottie, when did you finish the Potion?"

"About the same time as our greasy friend" she nods towards Snape and my jaw drops. Wonderful, Lottie's always been good at potions but never that good, I hate to say it but never as good as me. How did she become as good at potions as Snape is over night? How can I compete, keep up, keep _ahead_? Maybe she kissed him and he told her the secret of his potion skills, or she stole the potion off him, or…

Maybe I'm slightly hysterical?

"If you'd finished why did you need to charm your potion to look like Lily's?" Valid point Katie, good call.

"Who said anything about doing it properly? I just added too many dragon scales."

"O, yes," I nod sagely at Katie, "too many dragon scales. Is that _meant_ to mean anything to us?'

"If you dissolve enough in water they'll knock you out straight away. It says it all in the back of the book, all my potion has in it is water and dragon scales. I charmed it as I went along to make it look like I was following the stages properly." Lottie has to be the most infuriating person I've ever met. "Come on lets go. What've we got now?"

"Defence." I reply as we draw up at the door. "O shit."

"What?"

"I've left my book back in the potion's room, save me a seat will you while I run back and get it?"

After a minute's frantic running I'm just about to swing into the potions room when I spot my book on the floor. That's when I hear voices from the corner; Snape and Bellatrix. What on earth are they doing hanging around in the potions room together?

"Did you get the letter?" Bellatrix demands,

"Don't you think you're cutting it a bit close? What if he found out?" I am totally not eavesdropping. I AM NOT. (Honest)

"You worry to much, Severus, darling; after all items hidden in plain sight are often easiest to overlook. So come, darling?" Ew. She's stroking his cheek, voluntarily I might add. Ew. Snape nods once and Bellatrix smiles, "Good boy, don't be late for our little Astronomy tower rendezvous tomorrow night."

Right, I am not listening to this blatant seduction anymore, okay I knew Bellatrix was easy but honestly going out of your way to seduce Snape? Especially when your dating someone as possessive and psychotic as Lestrange. Maybe that's what Bellatrix is cutting too close; the visits to her boyfriend and her…Snape? EW, again. Who would have thought Bellatrix Black and Severus Snape in the sack, though I am only jumping to entirely accurate conclusions here, this school gets more twisted by the minute!

**Library**

Okay, I give up. I have been in the Library since supper – which I may as well add was 3 hours ago – with Katie, Alice and Lottie trying to get this damn defence project done. The horrifying thing is we haven't even made a dent in it!

Why am I always the last person to give in? Alice started using the table as a mattress at least an hour ago, Katie's actually using her Defence book as a pillow and Lottie is asleep in her chair.

Lottie actually gave up after about five minutes, not that that was unexpected, she said she was only coming along so the project would bore her to sleep. Alice and Katie did attempt to work but I think I may have got overly enthusiastic at some point and bored them to death too. Oh god. I'm one of those horrible people who hangs around boring people to death, like a big, boring, beaver!

"…"

Well, obviously not a beaver. Or that big. But boring, deathly boring.

Like a History of Magic lesson.

Shit.

What was that? I could have sworn I just heard something coming from the restricted section. Is that a light? Why is there a light when there are no people here?

Okay, now I definitely heard whispering.

Maybe I was more tired than I thought; someone must have left the book and lamp out as well as their…watch? Maybe there's a name in the book, or some kind of clue who it belongs to? _'1000 Useful Charms and Hexes with a little twist at the end', _well that doesn't sound like it belongs in the restricted section, what was the person looking at?

'_The Desire Charm._

_The Desire Charm will make anyone who is hit by it turn into their strongest and most ardent desire. The charm requires minimal preparation just…' _

Well that doesn't sound too bad. What's on the other page?

'_The Searing Hex._

_The Searing Hex induces the subject to feel s/he is on fire, the severe heat they believe they are under causes severe burns in addition to submitting the subject to believing they are facing their worst fears._

_WARNING:_

_During preliminary tests of the hex all cases ended in fatalities. To avoid unwanted injury use the counter curse detailed on page 63 before the hex has been in place for 30 seconds. _

Oh. Let's hope they were looking at the other page. Who in their right mind would look up _'The searing hex'_?

Well the book is yielding no clues, but the watch might. It's big and looks expensive and, I hope, it has a name engraved on it. Wishful thinking I guess.

Shit, is that the time? We're way past curfew. We're going to be in _so_ much trouble. O my god, O my god! Okay,

"Guys! GUYS! WAKE UP!"

Well with that pair of thuds two down one to go. Katie has somehow managed to fall off her chair with the book still safely over her face and Alice has somehow managed to roll off the table onto her pile of parchment. Is she still asleep? Is that even possible?

Okay this calls for drastic measures! Squirt water on Alice, kick Katie and shout coffee as loud as possible in Lottie's ear. Commencing, and…

"AAAAAAAHHHHHH, what in the name of Merlin's beard is going on?"

"OUCH! Lils that hurt!"

"Coffee! Where's the coffee?"

"Guys, we were meant to be in house over an hour and a half ago." In the name of pancakes what the hell do they think is going on?

"You mean there's no coffee?" Something _definitely _happened to Lottie when she was in the womb, or maybe all the damage occurred Ned hung off the top of the roof by her ankles…did he drop her?

Finally we're on our way. Let's hope we get back to Gryffindor without getting court.

Has all my Karma run out for this week? I swear the universe had turned against me.

"PEEVES!"

"What do we have here? A bunch of ickle girlies? STUDENTS OUT OF BOUNDS!"

I hate _that_ evil Poltergeist.

"FILCH!"

Oh my god. Oh my god.

We're heading outside? Okay, whose bright idea was that? How are we meant to get back in?

OOO it's raining! I _love_ the rain, especially big, fat, raindrops which get you soaking and wash away all your problems.

Like your running away from a man that has an odd obsession with thumb screws.

And his mangy cat.

That the universe has turned against you.

That there is someone in the school looking up searing hexes, who happens to own a very expensive, and nice, watch. Which he will probably be missing seeing as I have taken it.

Oh, and we haven't even made a dent in our defence project.

Nope, I'm too busy dancing in the rain with my friends to let any of my earthly problems worry me!

We're all covered in mud from head to toe, our uniforms have gone decidedly see through and we're stuck outside and incapable of getting back in without leaving a mud trail for all to follow.

Well, good luck to us with that.

"Ouch! Lils that hurt!" Honestly it was only a playful shove _I _didn't know there was a wall there. "Wait guys. Is the wall meant to do this?" Huh, the wall has just opened up, and it's light inside.

"I wonder what it is…"

"Lottie, don't even think about it!"

'Oh, come on what's the worst that could happen?"

"LILY EVANS! You are _not _siding with Lottie."

"Sorry Katie, but, you see, I know where she lives. I'm going in."

"Lottie!"

"Oh, Merlin's beard!"

"What is it?"

'Don't the Gryffindor Quidditch team understand what lockers are for? Boy is it a mess. I swear it's like someone's emptied there entire wardrobe here!"

Lottie really does have a point, I live in a dorm with five girls so I'm used to seeing things popping out of places they shouldn't be, and hardly being able to see the floor but this, this is just disgusting!

Probably something to do with the fact the Gryffindor Quidditch team only has two girl players. I can tell you for a fact that they will only change in dorm, looking at the state of this I can see why.

"How on earth do they actually use the showers? There are clothes everywhere, and I'm guessing none of them are clean." Well obviously that came from Katie; she's kind of a neat freak!

"Ugh! Lottie, that's disgusting!" Lottie, perhaps unwisely, decided to smell the nearest item of clean looking clothing and is, of course, coughing and spluttering everywhere. And for some reason she is also laughing. Oh god, she's been driven mad by the smell.

"It stinks of cologne! Whose is it? O Alice, catch! It's your boyfriends!"

"Not funny" Well, I haven't noticed you throwing it back, dear.

"Well, there are so many clothes here I doubt they'll notice if a few go missing. Besides if we just put them in the wash when we're done they'll go back to the owners no questions asked."

"Lottie you can't be serious!"

"I'm afraid I am Kate." Poor Katie looks highly sceptical, "Look would you prefer to go running around the castle traipsing mud everywhere and getting caught _or_ borrowing some random clothes and getting back to Gryffindor tower without the humiliating experience of facing McGonagall covered in mud and in a see-through shirt?"

"Why do I have to have the green hoodie? Why can't I have Katie's?"

"Lils, it's a hoodie! Besides, red clashes with your complexion." I hate Lottie sometimes. Why can't I have hers? She's got a black one and that defiantly doesn't clash with my complexion! Mind you this hoodie does smell oddly nice, kind of comforting really...

**Gryffindor Common room, 12:30am**

Well we managed to make it back without any bad karma affecting us! In basic terms we managed to avoid Filch and the bloody poltergeist. And at the moment are having a great time ribbing Alice! She's so funny when she's bright red!

"Alice honestly how can you breathe wearing that? Isn't it gassing you out?"

"Oh Katie of course it won't. She should be used to it by now. Lord knows she's spent enough time with him lately," Lottie as always manages a low-blow.

"Yes, how _is_ the "tutoring" going? Rumour has it you're very difficult to find now…"

"Yes, rumour has it the broom closest have been very full lately…" There's Lottie's addition to my starting point, and for the finale:

"What exactly is he tutoring you in Alice?" The best bit! Muahahaha!

I don't believe it! Alice has done an ostrich impersonation: enlarging the hoodie to giant proportions and pulling the hood over her head and tucking her feet in it to, it literally looks like there is a giant hoodie where Alice was once sitting.

"Alice? Are you okay? I'm sorry if we upset you!" Katie's always worried about upsetting people.

"Oh Katie give in! Of course we upset her. She was so upset she decided to commit suicide by gassing herself!" Lottie is definitely missing a sensitivity chip.

"AH! Alice! Please this thing is strangling me!"

Haha, Alice has charmed Lottie's hoodie so it's not only gigantic but it's squeezing her as well. She looks so funny; this giant hoodie just wondering around the common room strangling itself!

"Fine! I am going to bed. Good night!" Well, it came a bit more muffled than that from the behind the hoodie but you get the idea.

"Lottie. Lottie, that's the boys' stair case. Lottie!" Shit I better go get her! "AH! Damn you Alice!" She's done the same bloody thing to me hasn't she! So know I've just run straight into Lottie, who has run straight into the boys' staircase, so now we're stuck in a massive hoodie induced dog pile at the bottom of the stairs to the boys' dormitories. I think I've broken every bone in my body.

"What's going on?" Where did that little first year come from? Well at least it made Alice shrink all of our hoodies back, finally.

"BANG"

What the hell was that? I could have sworn the port hole just opened! "Did you see the port hole open?"

"No"

"I heard it'

"How strange!"

'That's odd!'

"Did you see anything?" I know I probably shouldn't start a conversation with a surly first year but we all had our backs to the porthole and the poor kid looks like he saw a ghost.

"No!" He said forcefully as if trying to convince himself, then he shook his head "Why were you trying to come up the boys' staircase?" Drat.

"We weren't trying to go up the staircase you see -"

"I'm blind!" Lottie what are you talking about?

"You are?" I was thinking the same thing kid.

"Yes I am! And my friends thought it would be a good joke to send me up the wrong staircase," Okay the little twerp's never going to believe that.

"Well I don't think that's very nice! You should have more consideration for you friends considering she is disabled and all." Or maybe he will, at least he's gone anyway.

"Don't worry about my second cousin," Lottie explains as I stare after him in obvious confusion, "He'll believe anything you tell him! I once told him that Father Christmas was an ex-convict from Azkaban and he refused to have any presents all Christmas. Anyway, I'm going to bed! By the way, Lils you dropped this," oops, I dropped the watch.

"Huh!"

"What was that?" We're all looking around the room for the source for the gasp which we heard when I produced the watch. I don't know about the others but the common room is beginning to get quite scary…

"I'm going to go to bed anyone coming?" I refuse to spend another second in here!

"Yep" as does Alice by the look of things

"Wait for me!"

"I'll be up in a second!" trust Lottie to stay behind just to make sure…

**Great Hall: Breakfast… hmm no pancakes!**

Well, the lake was refreshing but I honestly can't say the same for the conversation this morning. Unfortunately there doesn't seem to be any coffee resulting in the fact that Lottie is not even half awake and won't shut up about the wonders of sleep.

Katie's freaking out about the fact she hasn't done her charms homework and Alice is just recovering from the gas poisoning the hoodie must have given her, despite her protests to the contrary.

Olivia, the stupid stepsister, was running past at full pelt and has deliberately knocked Lottie on the back of her head so her drink goes everywhere in her attempt to get to the Marauders.

"An apology would be delightful Thomas!" Thomas is Olivia's last name; Lottie and Ned threatened to leave and never come back if their father adopted Olivia and Alice.

"Why should I apologise to you when you just degrade yourself everyday?"

"What the hell does that mean?" Lottie glares in return as I watch on,

"You know perfectly well what I mean!" Olivia retorts throwing a significant glance at me. Have I got something on my face? Uh oh Lottie's face has gone very dark k indeed.

The Marauders are looking just as furious as Lottie is. In fact they also all look like the walking dead; I guess sitting next to Olivia would do that to you. Peter seems to be missing his watch – I can see the paler skin where the sun had been blocked. I wonder…

What the? There are bubbles everywhere, massive huge bubbles. Filled with pancakes? I shake my head and stare amazed as Katie is hit by a bubble and turns into a charms essay, Lottie then ducks one bubble but trips over Olivia and falls to sleep over the bacon as another bubble smacks her full in the face.

All around people are popping into the strangest things as they touch the bubbles, did that girl just _disappear_? How many Marauders do we have in the school anyway? I swear they keep multiplying – everywhere I look there's more. I'd say the originals had cloned themselves if Black hadn't just started an argument with one of the copies that he would never ever wear a lilac toga.

Suddenly, something Lottie said earlier came back to me…

"_All I want is five more minutes sleep"_

O my god! The Desire Charm - Of course and the watch _is_ Peter's. The Marauders have pulled a prank.

Everyone's turned into their strongest desire, Katie's turned into what's probably the best Charms essay in existence, Lottie is asleep, and Alice is just staring at a bubble,

"Alice don't touch it; it's charmed to make you turn into your deepest desire,"

"How do you know? And how many people want Black, Potter and Lupin? And Frank?" She adds the last name in jealously as her crush trails an identical version of himself demanding to know how he got there!

"I know because I found the spell open in the restricted section next to Pettigrew's watch, look I'll get Lottie back to dorm if you grab Katie?"

"Hmm we should probably copy Katie for Katie,"

"I'm not sure it will work …"

"Lils?"

"Yeah?" I say this as I wrench Lottie out of her seat, this spell is getting old, fast.

"'How long does this thing last for?"

"I don't know but I think Lots is waking up"

"What's going on?" My bleary weight mumbles, I take this form of conscious thought as a reason to drop her,

"The Marauders have filled the school with bubbles charmed with the 'Desire charm' and everybody is tuning into their strongest desire. But if it only last five minutes like you then everyone should turn back soon"

"I think it'll take longer than five minutes Lils."

"Why?"

"Well, my strongest desire was only for five minutes extra sleep, so it only lasted five minutes. I think that Katie's going to remain a charms essay until the time comes for her to hand herself in."

"I hate this charm, why is it so literal?"

Nobody comments.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here? A group of Little Gryffindorks and their mudblood minion?" Wonderful, just wonderful, my friend is stuck as a charms essay and we just ran into Bellatrix Black and her group of psychos.

"Fuck off, Black!" Please don't kill me. (My pride wouldn't let me say that out loud.)

"How _dare_ you tell me to fuck off you filthy little Mudblood you're not even to fit to go to school here let alone stand in the same hallway as me?" When I fist came to Hogwarts, an insult like Mudblood didn't affect me all that much, I mean 'dirty blood' really is a weak insult. Yet after six years of being called it practically every single day it's gained a new meaning.

It's the slang for inferior, it means your nothing and it's got the same ring as calling you a bastard. And my pride can't quite take being called nothing or being called a bastard after my mum and dad died.

"How dare you call Lily that, you psychopathic bitch, she's twice the witch you'll ever be." Lottie spits in retaliation, jumping to my defence if anyone ever calls me that.

'Don't you talk to me you blood traitor!" Bellatrix returns.

"If being a blood traitor means I don't have to follow that psychotic bastard then darling I'm proud of it!."

"Your mother would have been so disappointed in you Price; making friends with Mudblood and blood traitors and scum. Her memory is sullied by your actions and I bet she is squirming in her grave."

Lottie's mother was an Avery. A very pure blood family and traditionally an all Slytherin one; her family refused to speak to her when she was put into Ravenclaw and completely disowned their only daughter when she married a 'blood traitor' and a Gryffindor, Lottie's father.

"Don't you ever talk about my mother! She was smart enough to know Muggle borns were the only way for us to survive, which was if I remember rightly part of the reason why she turned your idiot of a father down."

"You'll pay for that Price!"

"I'm looking forward to it Black!"

"What is going on here?" Shit, trust the head girl and boy to show up now.

Lottie and Bellatrix are mentally torturing and killing each other before ritually incinerating their victims remains so I reply,

"Nothing Tim. Alice, Katie, Lottie and I were just going to Charms, weren't we?" I add on forcefully

"Then I would suggest that you and your friends get to your classes before you're late. You two Black!"

As we cross in the hallway Bellatrix slams into my shoulder before heading off,

"You know an apology would work!" Lottie can never let anything go.

"Why should I apologise to you when you just degrade yourself everyday?" Um, déjà vu anybody?

"That's what Olivia said this morning… you don't suppose? No. No she's stupid, but not that stupid...Is she?" Lottie mutters to me as we walk off. Olivia wouldn't start believing that would she?

I mean for god's sake Olivia has lived with me for over three years - she's not going to start going all –

The idea's absurd. Olivia isn't the nicest of people but she wouldn't start believing that bollocks.

Would she?

Jesus, could I be living with a future Death Eater?

A/N: hey sorry it's taken so long. This chapter is rather bitty and a bit more serious than the others, but hopefully things will start to take shape soon. Let me know what you think, and hopefully I'll be able to update soon. Please REVIEW

SP


	6. Chapter 6

_**Sirius protégé**_

_Oblivious _

**_Disclaimer_**: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine! Thanks to the over-active imagination of a 16 year old girl.

WARNING: there will be alcohol abuse and a lot of swearing in this fanfic.

Be England what she will, with all her faults she is my country still – Winston Churchill.

Chapter 6

**Last lesson: Yay! Transfiguration: Shit.**

I'm scared.

…

Seriously, really odd things are happening! Okay, so after you insult and exchange death threats with a couple of Slytherins you would normally expect odd things to happen, right? But not even Lottie can fathom why a rampaging Slytherin would put lilies on the desk of their next victim. Unless it's an ironic twist that lilies are a funeral flower and that therefore I'm going to die. Nah.

So:

A) Why would a Slytherin leave me lilies? Unless it was poisoned. They aren't.

B) Who in god's name would leave me a lily? It's so unbelievably stupid! I may not mind being called Lily but everyone knows I'm allergic to the pollen in them!

Since last entry things have been getting progressively worse. I have found perfume in my book bag. I have received three love letters. Yes, you heard me right, LOVE notes on my parchment. Not just any love letters either, o no, _bad_ love letters. Hideous, terrible, tragic mutilations of the English language that make me want to either laugh at the thing altogether or cry that someone thinks it is romantic. Obviously laughing is a much saner option considering if they are real love letters some idiot thinks he is in love with me. _Fool!_

Unfortunately, it doesn't stop there. Everyday, every single bloody day, there is a note in a red envelope on my plate telling me how beautiful I am, not just an ordinary letter but a howler. A HOWLER! And it goes off whether I want it to or not.

This morning was the cream on top of the double sticky toffee truffle cake! I woke up to find my bed surrounded by rose bushes, the roses tentatively winding all the way up my bed posts to cover the canopy. I myself was covered in rose petals! And now every time I walk into the great hall I am literally showered in the things. Plus I think someone is following me! I think I have a stalker!

'DEATH BY LILIES: THE LILY STALKER STRKIES AGAIN'

You can just see the headlines can't you?

And to make things worse, Lottie was attacked by the Slytherins this morning. She was just about to drink her usual coffee when Olivia (who is getting on my nerves more and more everyday now fulfilling her role as a stereotypical step-sister) did her usual 'run-into-Lottie-on-way-to-breakfast-thing' causing her to spill her coffee, which turns out wasn't coffee but something very corrosive.

Well moving on swiftly we've decided to stop avoiding the Marauders, and sod's law that means that we're running into them less and less.

O god, McGonagall has just arrived. I _hate_ transfiguration. In general it's not that bad but it's certainly not my best subject, not that I'm bad at it. The real reason I hate it is that since Black and Potter pulled a prank on McGonagall a few years ago we've been forced to sit in Alphabetical order.

So I'm on the end of a row, Katie on one side and, unfortunately, Katie has Black on the other. Lottie, o poor poor Lottie, poor poor poor Lottie. It's a good thing she is verifiably insane – she's stuck next to Potter and Chris Osborne. Osborne, just for the record, is as much of a dick as Potter is but he's just not as fit.

…

Okay let me rephrase that: Osborne, just for the record, is as arrogant and egotistical as Potter is but he's just not as charming, charismatic and good looking…

I did not just write that!

It shall be struck from the record, well it would be if this Diary wasn't being written in Zonko's finest, multicoloured, utterly permanent, non-refundable mystery ink.

But come on! Give me a break okay? Potter _is_ fit, as is Black and Lupin. They're all good looking, so it's not like I'm making an exception for Potter, although his smile is far more mischievous than the others.

But Black's eyes are never serious and Lupin mouth is always twitching so it all balances!

Gah.

I'm just digging myself into a hole here aren't I? Let's just get one thing straight - because at the moment it sounds like I fancy Potter which is NOT true, I just happen to think he's good looking I'd be lying if I said Potter wasn't my favourite Marauder. I used to think that Lupin was the best of the Marauders because you could have a decent conversation with him but since the holidays Potter had kind of grown on me. In a purely PLATONIC way.

Okay?

Good.

Anyway back to the lesson at hand! McGonagall's asked us to pair up and practise transfiguring a mouse into a teapot. And guess who I'm stuck with?

Guessed?

No! Not a Marauder. Don't be so bloody cliché! I'm stuck with the crème de la crème of idiocies, the highest of the high horses, the blondest of the bottle blondes… step forward Gildory Lockhart!

'Afternoon Lily flower, how are you?' Lily flower… LILY FLOWER!

'Fine.'

'But my Lily Flower you sound distressed!' how thick are you? Ugh! He winked at me! Wait a minute _My_ Lily flower?

'Lockhart! No one calls me "Lily Flower" and I'm not yours or anyone elses!' How dare someone I barely know label me as their own? Why on earth would they think they could call me "my Lily Flower?" And why are my friends and the Marauders finding this so interesting?

Mind you the Marauders do take an annoying interest in our affairs. They always seem to know everything we've been up to. And lord knows how they find out.

'Not yet!' I think I just choked on my shock 'Anyway _my_ Lily flower what do you think of my hair? I spent hours trying to get it to curl like that, do you like it?'

'It's lovely, _Lockhart_.' Somebody save me.

'Holy Fuck!' Lottie has just jumped away from a piece of parchment on her desk, turning as white as sheet as everyone turns to her in confusion.

'What the hell, Price?' Potter has just picked up the parchment and one look at Lottie's face convinces me he shouldn't see it.

'Thanks Potter!' I smile brightly up at him and banish the damn thing to dorm. Not before I see what caused Lottie to be so upset. My Smile falters as I see the Dark Mark ominously inked onto the page. Potter is frowning at me, almost in concern; I hate it when people frown at me.

'What is it Miss Price?' McGonagall calls, her lips thinning

'Nothing, Professor! I, er, a spark from my wand landed on my hand and burnt me, that's all!'

'Then I suggest that you get back to your studies.'

'Yes, professor.'

**Back in dorm, operation rose bush about to go into action!**

Transfiguration did not go as planned, you might have guessed that, "have best friend threatened by Voldemort's henchmen" was not on my list of things to do today. Potter, being Potter, couldn't leave the damn thing alone. So come the end of the class we couldn't escape off to dorm to discuss what happened but found ourselves instead cornered in a deserted classroom by four boys.

So, we were just coming out of Transfiguration, minding our own business, when the Marauders came charging out and Black threw Lottie against the wall.

_**Lily, stop exaggerating!** _Go away Katie this is _my_ diary.

**He did not throw me! ** God, Lottie, it's called 'embellishment.'

So, we were just coming out of Transfiguration, minding our own business, when the Marauders came charging out and Black shoved Lottie into a wall.

_**Lily **_

Okay fine gently shoved her against the wall! Jesus you people have no appreciation for exaggeration, and the fine art of story telling.

After basically circling us Potter, acting all leader-like, stepped forward and said something along the lines of:

'Price, for the good of planet Earth, I need you to give me the secret parchment so the destruction of the evil one can be complete.'

_**Um…what?**_

Fine, ok, what he really said was, 'What the hell was that about?

So. of course, Lottie's response was 'None of your bloody business Potter!'

**_Actually I think she said something along the lines of… 'What did you say?'_**

**Huh? O something along the lines of 'About what?'**

Well actually I thought it was a bit stronger than that but at least the Marauders still got really ticked off.

**_Actually I think Potter just rolled his eyes, and Remus was definitely smiling…_**

**Black was trying to out stare me!**

Will you guys stop interrupting me! How the hell are you guys even managing to write in here?

**It's really very simple Lils. We've charmed your diary so everything you write turns up in our books and anything we write turns up in yours.**

Why would you bother looking up something like that.

**_Just so we can clarify that you like Potter in a completely platonic way; you actually had us worried for a second that you fancied him! _ **

Anyway back to the story without ANY interruptions!

Black, unable to out stare Lottie (**as if anybody could**), tried to play the intimidating role, 'Do you think this is a joke Price? We're talking about that lovely picture that was on your parchment, you know the one with the skull spewing a fat snake out of its mouth? Pretty unforgettable if you ask me.'

'Well then I guess it was a good thing nobody asked you.'

'Jesus Christ, Price can't you see that this is serious? Cooper and Evans are in danger now as well! So what the hell is going on?' Potter the idiot DID loose his cool at this point.

_**True he did… the Idiot!**_

**And at that point Lily lost hers! **

I was just about to get to that thank you very much! Well I, uh, got enormously annoyed at Potters short sightedness and, laid into him slightly.

'Holy pancakes Potter, I'm Muggle born! I'm in danger just coming to the damn school! Katie and Lottie are already in danger just by being friends with _me_! It's none of your bloody business why Lottie got that wonderful little surprise this morning. What on earth makes you think we'd tell you lot anyway? You're a whole bloody group of purebloods - why the fuck do you even care? You're not the ones in danger, you're not considered inferior! So why don't you stop pretending like you understand and just do yourselves and your parents a favour and _keep out_!'

I stormed off, Lottie and Katie thankfully in tow as I may have been _slightly _harsh on our famous foursome.

_**Little doesn't even begin to cover it!**_

**They deserved it. They shouldn't have been so short sighted and besides why should they care? How on earth can any of them understand the immediate danger Lily's in? Their parents protect them from the horrid danger people like Lily are in, so that they can come back to school and pull some funny pranks to make life lighter for people like her.**

Clever. But incredibly stupid.

**_Now who's being short sighted? Black comes from a pure-blooded dark arts family. He knows exactly how much danger people like Lily are in. Plus I think you're under estimating Lupin and Potter; their parents might not tell them everything, but they're not blind and they are observant! They might not know the full extent of what goes on but with Black as a friend I sure they're well updated!_**

Well…

Humph…

How do I get rid of this rosebush then?

_**Changing the subject much? **_

**Why don't you just banish it into the school grounds?**

How come I never think of things like that?

**You're just not as wonderfully blessed as me!**

Insert large snort from Katie and me. But it worked thank goodness! Lily, Queen of avoiding potentially dangerous situations, now minus one rosebush around bed… just another 24 to go!

**Hospital wing: Wednesday**

I hate Bellatrix Black. I hate her. I hate her. I HATE HER! I know, I don't know her, she isn't really that bad a person just someone who's severely misunderstood…

But it's thanks to her, that Lottie and I have to go and visit Shrinks again! Yes, those freaky little goblin psychiatrists that come in and pretend to solve all your problems. We all had to have them for a time in fourth year, basically Dumbledore didn't think we were _coping _well. That's a euphemism for me being Bulimic, Lottie's anorexia and Katie's home issues.

With Lottie Ned had just left home, her dad was getting re-married and she just felt completely abandoned. Then she started to drink. Then _I_ started to drink. That was the way Ned had coped with the death of his mother. Yet when he left Hogwarts we were going into our fourth year and he went away on tour with the Appleby Arrows and sobered up completely.

No one seemed to notice or care that we were going down hill. Then Ned and Charlie came back and started to try and make us eat things. It was only when I started fainting that I, we admitted we had a problem.

Anyway we had to see a shrink. And, as usual, I've gotten completely off the topic which is what bitches Bellatrix Black and Lottie's mentally unstable step-sister are.

We weren't doing anything! Lottie, Katie and I were just walking to Charms, when who do we run into?

'Oh look if it isn't our favourite Gryffindorks!' So the Queen Bitch deigns to speak in front of _scum_.

'Wow! Incest hasn't completely messed up her brain! She can still see!' What? I'm easily goaded!

'I could have sworn that it had.'

'Shocking! Absolutely shocking!'

'Still hanging out with the Mudblood are you Price? Are you never going to learn? Your brother never degraded himself that way.'

'Wow! The psychotic cow actually has the brains to go for another plan of attack – insult Lottie's brother when you've used up all the one's your addled mind can some up with for her mother. Smooth, Black very smooth!' God, Katie really is ticked off.

'How dare you address her Cooper; your family isn't much better than the Mudbloods!' Olivia? Openly insulting us?

'Since when did you get fucked up Thomas? Mind you you're doing your sister a favour: the more fucked up you become the saner she gets. It's so touching sacrificing yourself for you sister.'

There was a moment of stunned silence then Olivia tried to punch Lottie.

Well Lottie got very quickly tied up with trying to rip Olivia to pieces.

Then, because she just can't let dead dogs die, or sleeping dogs lie, or something like that, Bellatrix fired the body binding curse at Lottie. Well she would have if I hadn't punched her first, and thrown her wand away. She unfortunately then decided it would be fun to tackle me to the ground.

Luckily for us, Katie being a smart one, performed the full-body bind on the rest of the Slytherins.

The next thing I remember is Lottie repeatedly banging Olivia's head on the floor and someone coming up from behind and pulling her off. Katie already had someone pinning her arms to her sides and I was the one that was proving to be difficult.

Bellatrix had me against the wall and both of us were kicking and punching each other. It was quite spectacular really, I finally managed to trip Bellatrix and started punching her repeatedly when two more people appeared out of no where and pulled us apart, however I'm never that easy! I elbowed the person in the stomach just as Bellatrix hit the person holding her back in the groin, Bellatrix got her wand back so I nicked the person's who was still attempting to hold on to me and fired something at Bellatrix.

In the end it only stopped when Professor McGonagall appeared and used her wand and literally screamed 'expelliarmus.' Then someone grabbed both Bellatrix and I.

'What is going on here?'

'It's Prices fault! She insulted Olivia!'

'So you'd call telling me I'm a mudblood an insult to Olivia?'

'Honest Professor,' Bellatrix whined, 'It was Price's fault, if she wasn't so jumped up with this Pureblood nonsense this would never have happened.'

'And I suppose you were just trying to help out, _dear_ cousin, by hitting Evans around the head.'

Bellatrix glared at Black.

So in the end we all got taken to Dumbledore's office, the witnesses, our charms class and the transfiguration class had to state what they saw, after that had happened we all got given a severe talking to. Bellatrix, Olivia and the rest of them had detention until the end of term and Lottie, Katie and I? Well that was different.

Dumbledore started out with, 'Have you three anything to say?'

We just shrugged and Lottie tried, 'Rage blackouts?'

'I see.' Dumbledore sounded so grim that I wasn't sure what to think but I should have guessed Lottie's comment would have ended us in deep shit. He just nodded at McGonagall and left the room.

'I'm not going to give you detentions…' well she started off well,

'You're not?' whatever I was expecting it wasn't that.

'No, I think you three would benefit from some outside help. This does not mean you are being let off Scot free, you will be expected to speak to someone everyday and to partake in whatever treatment they deem necessary.'

'You mean a shrink?'

'Yes Miss Price I mean a Psychiatrist.'

'But Professor…'

'This, Miss Evans, is beyond contestation.' So now I'm stuck in the hospital wing waiting for the nurse to get round to me. What I don't get is why she's treating Sirius when Lottie, Katie and I are all far worse off!

Wait a minute, Sirius has a black eye? Was he involved in the fight?

'Mr. Black, you must stop getting into dangerous situations, trying to stop a large scale fight with out a wand. Absolutely ridiculous. Fighting in the corridors in this day and age…" The nurse rambled on as Black's black eye began to fade.

'I was trying to stop the murder of my cousin.' Oops! He's looking right at Lottie…

"O stop being such a baby and deal with it!" she must be in pain, when Lottie snaps at someone it's usually a lot worse.

Black doesn't look to happy with that, somehow I think he was expecting an apology… o well he'll get over it!

**Supper great hall:**

It's lamb. I love lamb! I can't eat it in the spring usually but seeing as there is a lack of lambs present with the exception of those currently nicely roasted and sitting on the platters I see no reason for not indulging myself!

'Pass the mint sauce would you Kate?' I love mint sauce. I don't think I've ever come across a mint sauce that is better than Hogwarts'

'Fancy having some lamb with your sauce, Lils?'

'Oh very funny Lots! I can barely breathe from laughter Ho, ho, ho!'

'Well you won't be laughing soon!' Alice?

'Why?'

'Lils, you're a prefect for god's sake, _you_ must know!' Um…did Remus forget to write something important on the last lot of prefect's minutes? 'O, of course, they won't have told you because it's a surprise! I only found out because I overheard.' She smirks, mock evilly, before wandering off.

The sudden rush of silence alerts me to Dumbledore standing up and signalling that he has an announcement to make. He wouldn't tell the entire school he thinks Lottie, Katie and I are basket cases and therefore are having to see shrink is he? Maybe our beloved Headmaster is actually a malevolent, vindictive, sprite.

'I just have a few words to say before you all return to your superb suppers. There will be a Valentine's Ball for fourth year upwards…' at this he was cut off by a roar of voices, instead of attempting to be heard over them Dumbledore instead sat down and continued with his supper.

'I'm in shock.' So am I Lottie, so am I.

'I can't believe he did that to us, think of all the rantings and ravings we're going to have to put up with for a whole bloody two weeks!' O god, Katie has a point.

Dumbledore has just subjected us to the rantings and ravings of exited teenage girls who love balls. The next two weeks are going to be filled with whose asked whom and who's wearing what and god forbid that two girls buy the same dress! 'I always new Dumbledore had a dark side!'

**Friday afternoon: common room, seriously worried!**

I'm worried. Seriously, seriously worried! My stalker has just stepped up a level and given me the most disgusting, most clichéd present that I hope no boy would ever dream of giving you, until you are sure of his character.

_**Chocolates!**_

Yes, Katie is, unfortunately, telling the truth. I woke up to find a rather timid box of chocolates with the annoying note that screams how pretty I am next to my plate at breakfast! Quite a contrast really.

**_It makes you wonder if they're from the same person. Maybe they're not from the stalker._**

I was just about to come to that! Katie had this theory that the chocolates aren't from the stalker but from the Slytherins! I mean it could work… you'd have to be blind as well as deaf to not notice I have one! And seeing as my recent encounter with Bellatrix didn't exactly end the way she wanted it to.

**That has to be the most absurd idea I've ever heard! Trust me if Black was going to kill you she'd want to witness it not give you the dignity of doing it in you own house!**

**_Oh come on Lots! It's exactly the type of thing we wouldn't expect though! Don't roll your eyes at me Lottie Price!_**

**Katie, seriously do you think Bellatrix Black, Queen Bitch, would try to kill someone with chocolates? **

**_Well, are you willing to bet Lily's life on it?_**

**Are you challenging me?**

Fortunately this little conversation is all light-hearted, we don't _actually _think that the chocolates are poisoned. Katie and Lottie are always having these jokes and bets. The only trouble is I usually end up as the guinea pig!

Once they made a bet that this boy couldn't keep a relationship for longer than a fortnight. Guess who had to date him for a week? Jesus he was a terrible pull! The things I do for my friends… anyway back to the frivolous conversation with sinister undertones!

**You're challenging me?**

_**Does it not sound like I am?**_

**Fine, I bet 1 gallon that they're from Lily's stalker.**

_**And I bet 1 Gallon they're not! How should we test it? **_

I refuse to eat one, are you insane?

**Fine we'll give them to Black! He's been making my life hell for not apologising. Let's see how ill this makes him… if it does, which it won't. Have a Bezeor stone ready won't you?**

I don't believe it she's actually going over to Black and Potter to give them the chocolates!

'Black? Hey er… sorry about giving you a black eye. Okay bye!' Never let it be said that Lottie is a bad actress, she played the nervous, embarrassed thing perfectly. Dear Lord, Sirius Black did _not_ just check out Lottie's arse as she walked away. No, I am in denial, he didn't. Mind you he probably thinks she fancies him know.

**Great now all we have to do is wait.**

They're eating the chocolates…

…

Nothing's happening.

They're just stuffing their faces! How bloody disappointing, I could have used some chocolates.

'He's so handsome!' Um…what was that Black?

'How have I never noticed how much I love him?'

'His hair's the colour of the sun!' huh? I thought Black favoured brunettes!

'His eyes are like the ocean! Such a beautiful colour!' Potter…I honestly don't know what to say.

'Guys… er who are you talking about?' Yes, we _all _want to know, Lupin.

'Lockhart.' They both reply and I feel my jaw drop.

'What? You can't love him I love him!' Well, I never, Black bats for the other side? He keeps that well hidden.

'You can't love him like I do!' Potter too? Well if this isn't a day for coming out of the closet.

'You boyfriend stealer!' Black was dating Lockhart?

'You two faced cow!' is Potter…crying?

O MY GOD Black just slapped Potter!

Black _slapped_ Potter? O my god… Love potion!

**Lockhart's… Lockhart's your … your secret admirer? It's just too funny! Lils look Potter and Black are having a cat… a cat… a cat fight!**

**_You really can't beat entertainment like this can you? Get some Popcorn Lots!_**

Guys? are they going to remember this later?

**Oh shit!**

_**We're screwed!**_

**Yep!**

May I suggest we escape while they're still in love with Lockhart?

_**Good idea… I think Lots has already gone.**_

Bloody coward how on earth did she get in Gryffindor?

**A/N: **Hey guys!

Well I know this chapter had been a long time in coming but you've got to bear with me and my beta Tweeny. We're doing A-levels and have shit loads of work. So I did it as best and as fast as I could. Hopefully the next chapter won't take so long but I can't promise anything! If you go on my Profile there is a direct link to my Blog which will have all the info on any new chapters! Feel free to leave me a comment as well if my scatty thoughts inspire you to do so.

Right well this chapter was meant to be longer but this just seemed like such a perfect place to stop so some of the things that were originally meant to take place here will take place next chapter instead.I hoped you all liked it and please

**REVIEW!**

Any helpful criticism is always welcome and I really like to know what you think. Thanks a lot for bearing with me!

SP


	7. Chapter 7

_**Sirius protégé**_

_Oblivious _

**_Disclaimer_**: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine! Thanks to the over-active imagination of a 16 year old girl.

_**A/N: Hey guys just to warn you this hasn't been EDITED yet! My beta's really busy, there is and explanation at the bottom, just to warn you- Enjoy!**_

WARNING: there will be alcohol abuse and a lot of swearing in this fanfic.

_Those who do not complain are never pitied – Mrs Bennet Pride and Prejudice_

_

* * *

Chapter 7_

**Saturday 4:30 in the morning not happy!**

Seeing as it's a Saturday you'd think I'd be happy, No school, No work, just a free day to do what I like when I like… well you'd be wrong oh so extremely wrong on so many levels.

You see Saturdays are devoted to Quidditch, and as much as I love that sport, I don't really love it this much! You see, Nat bloody Jones, invites the whole, of the year below who I might add are bunch of bimbows, into are dorm. You might think this isn't a bad thing…

**Until you find out that they get up at 4:00 have showers in our bathroom use our shampoo and conditioners and then start drying their hair extremely noisily. Hello! Ever heard of a drying charm?**

Lottie if you haven't noticed is not a 4:00 in the morning person!

_But that's only half of it! Wait to you hear the racket that goes on about makeup and outfits!_

And Katie as you already know isn't a morning person!

_And why do they do all of this I hear you ask? Hum? Well I'll tell you it's all on account of those bloody Marauders! They want to look pretty in the stands for stupid Black and Potter, and you should see the fights that go on in dorm about who gets to sit next to the commentator's box, just so they can flutter eyes at Lupin! It's disgusting!_

**Of course it also has something to do with the fact that if Gryffindor wins the Marauders throw a party in the common room… and that's a pretty definite bet seeing as we're playing Huffelpuff and their team is absolutely Crap at the moment.**

So Lottie Katie and I have a small predicament. Seeing as we can't sleep we move down to the common room and attempt to sleep on the sofas in the common room… which is where we are now. Alice, the little tart, well her relationship with Frank Longbottom has developed into a close friendship. And believe me when I say Friendship… Franks terrified of frightening her off again and Alice isn't the type to make the first move, so it's strictly friends at the moment. So she has gone to sleep with him in the Marauders dorm. Eugh!

_You wouldn't be saying that if it was Matt, and you could go and sneak into his bed!_

Oh shut up!

**Why Lily! You haven't written about him once yet!**

Lottie that's because I don't want anybody else to find out about it yet!

_You mean you've been too busy occupying broom closets to write anything in here yet!_

**Oh come on Lils whose going to read this but us eh? Lily's been seeing this Bloke Matt Brookes from Slytherin! He's got blonde hair Blue eyes, he actually looks a bit like Potter…**

_Basically really fit! And Lily's usual type, I might add, what ever happened to the 'I'm no longer going to go for the angelic type' scenario?_

**Thank you Katie but I'm perfectly capable of writing that!**

_Sorry!_

**Anyway Lily's been paired up with him for are DADA project! And one time in the library when they were meant to be working Lily lent over and he…**

He kissed me! Alright? I wasn't expecting it but I was hardly going to complain! Anyway to stop this long story getting longer, we ended up meeting up a lot he took me out to Hogesmead on the Hogesmead weekend, and now we're basically going out.

_He, he, he!_

**I love it when she goes red!**

Guys? Hello! Stuck in common room? 4:00 in the morning come on people focus here!

**You know last time there was a Quidditch match they went outside, in the middle of winter wearing a mini skirt? A mini skirt? In the middle of winter without tights or boots! They stood out like an elephant in a mouse cage!**

_Lots that's hardly surprising, they were dressed for summer, so those oh so gorgeous Quidditch players could notice them and want to keep them warm._

**Yeh because being bright blue and shaking is oh so deadly attractive, and I'm sure Black and Potter just dream about keeping living corpses warm!**

I really am brilliant! Lily, the Queen of distraction.

_Sorry I missed that why are you queen of distraction?_

**I wonder if there going to do the same thing this year… I might take a photo and publish it in Weird Discovery's magazine… the new zombie, a living shaking blue corpse… what d' you think?**

Er… sleep. I'm really tired and could really use some sleep, and you know what Lots is like at Quidditch matches so I'm going to try and sleep…

_Oh okay… wow never new Lils could get to sleep that fast! Lots you must be rubbing off on her…_

**What was that? Sorry I was ranting.**

_Lots do you think Lils is…_

**Is what?**

_I don't know she's just acting really weirdly about Max… do you think she actually likes him?_

**Lils isn't exactly the type to date guys she doesn't like… not unless she's trying to piss someone off or get someone jealous… but I don't think she fancies anyone else at the moment… **

_You don't think she's in denial about someone do you?_

**Depends on who you've got in mind…**

_I don't know…I don't really have anyone in mind! I was just wondering…_

**Well I think you worry too much! If Lily didn't like Matt then she wouldn't go out with him… and if she wasn't sure about it then she'd date him until she was… that's probably what she's doing! Seriously don't worry about it! She'll be fine**

_But he's a Slytherin and a pureblood for Christ sake what's he doing dating a Muggle born?_

**Oh I see so these are your insecurities about him…**

_There yours too! And don't you try to deny it I read your diary!_

**Ah!**

_Yes ah! Well now the cat's out of the bag what are we going to do?_

**I don't know trust her judgement I guess… Katie you better erase what you've written and I'll do the same, I don't what Lils to find out about are insecurities!**

_Yeh sure…_

**Night!**

_Night… I don't why I bother she's asleep the minuet her head hits the pillow!_

**Common room Six in the morning**

'Sh Padfoot! You'll wake them up!' What in Gods name is going on?

'Oh look! Lily kins keeps a diary, how cute!' huh? I think I'm drawing a blank hear who in gods name is Padfoot?

'Why are they sleeping down here?' who is that? Sounds familiar but still drawing a blank… too much energy to open eyes!

'Hey maybe that, can help us out,' Er what?

'Prongs, honestly that's…'

'Oh come on Moony we're only reading the last entry it's not like we're leafing through the whole thing… although it would be interesting…'

'Prongs no! The last entry fine but nothing else, it's an invasion of privacy otherwise'

'Alright Moony keep your hat on! What does it say mate?' Oh god tell me that isn't Black?

'Nat Jones kicks them out round about four to start getting ready for the Match… oh isn't that sweet we get blamed for it guys!' Yep it's Black and Potter so I'm assuming it's all of the Marauders down here.

'Ah isn't that so sweet of them!' Wow never heard Lupin go sarcastic before. Mind you I never thought Lupin would be one to read a diary.

'Did you see Alice in our room?'

'No I just assumed Frank got fat over night,' does Potter have no brains? Wait or was that an attempt at sarcasm?

'Did you know Evans was dating Matt Brookes?' And why would that be of interest to Potter? And why is his voice so quite?

'Want to prank him?' Don't even think about it Black!

'Matt Brookes! But she's Muggle Born why on earth would Matt… Unless?' Why is my dating Matt so worrying for Lupin? And what is that 'unless' for?

'Oh that's not good!' Why is that not good? Jesus and here was me thinking Black would have learnt the art of elaboration by now! Wait a minuet… they're reading my diary… they're reading my diary!

'Ha, ha! Price is actually quite funny! 'Blue and shaking deadly attractive' ha! Who thought she had anything but a venomous tongue!'

'Padfoot don't judge her, you don't know her, snap decisions about people is what develops prejudices,' wow deep for Potter.

'Your one to speak! You don't know Evans but you were quick enough to decide about her! Besides I rather like the fact Price nearly always bites my head off and banters with me… it's refreshing to have it based on a mutual hatred, instead of mutual attraction.' What snap decision about me?

'I wouldn't go so far to say that she hates you Padfoot, I think we just seem to catch them at the wrong times…' My diary… Okay I have to get up… 'AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH' when in gods name did the couch disappear?

'Quick Padfoot, take it! You alright Evans?'

'Oh shut up Potter! Why did you have to go and wake me up like that?' my head really hurts.

'No offence Evans but I didn't exactly force you to fall off the sofa!' Yeh right! Oh well at least he's gentlemanly enough to help me up… and on to KATIE!

'What in Gods name is going on?' Oh poor Kate she hates waking up… especially after someone just sat on her face!

'Nothing these buffoons just decided to wake us up.' Black is shaking Lots… good luck waking her up that way!

'Hey how do you wake Price up?' exchange a look with Katie and smile…

'Just say Coffee that usually works.' I'm so going to enjoy this! Pay back Black!

Yep sure enough a startled Lottie has just turned around and rather violently hit Black in the face, 'What? Oh I'm so… oh never mind, what's going on? We being invaded or something?' she's noticed the other Marauders.

'No we just saw you sleeping and were wondering why… so we decided to wake you up.'

'Black we're usually sleeping in the common room on Quidditch days. Why start waking us up now?' Oh this will be interesting another Black Price bantering session.

'Well we were curious…'

'Oh you mean you realised there was more to the world than you? That's a pity I preferred it when I could get some sleep.'

'Oh shut up Price! We just got to know you that's all! And we were wondering like any acquaintance would why you were sleeping on the couch.'

'I'd hardly call giving you a black eye getting to know us and becoming acquaintances Black!'

'Yeh but we can put names to your faces now can't we?'

'Oh great, now they know are names we never going to be able to get any sleep on game nights!

'You see what I mean mate? Much nicer when it's bases on a mutual hatred!' touché, but I do wish Black wouldn't smile.

'That went right over my head! Somebody want to explain?' I could tell Lottie exactly what I mean but that would probably end up with my having to admit I was awake and I'd prefer to avoid explaining that.

'Nothing for you to worry about Price, anyway you guys coming to breakfast now that you're up?' smooth Potter very smooth but aren't you forgetting the rules?

'Nah it's okay.' That should satisfy the empty request and maybe we can get some more shut eye before the game.

'Why not?' why not? Why not?

'Because…'

'Because…' okay now he's just sounding like a broken record!

'Because we don't have breakfast with…'

'The team… non players can't eat with the team on game days its tradition… my brother started it!' thank god for Lottie! I'm not joking I would of landed myself in such a big hole if I'd said Marauders which I most likely would have done.

'Christ you must really hate attention!' right, when did Potter begin to see through our excuses? He doesn't know us that well… well at least I hope not otherwise I have another stalker!

'That was random.' Let's see if we can decoy him from this, it's not good news when the Marauders know you weakness… especially one they particularly good at exploiting!

'Not really, for one, it's pretty obvious you lot try to be as unnoticeable as possible, and two that rule about team players is absolute bull shit, Ned was telling us over new years how he used to enjoy dragging his girlfriends down to breakfast on game days, which leaves if you use the art of elimination Evans… your hate of attention.' Okay I'm not six no need to get patronising with me!

'Okay Potter you right with your amazing art of elimination you caught us out, we don't want to have breakfast with a bunch of testosterone high, chauvinistic idiots! So what, are you going to do about it?' lets see him get around that one, usually when Potters insulted his head explodes from not hearing compliments for the first time.

'That's a good question Evans. What shall we do Padfoot? I really don't fancy having breakfast without anyone to torment…' Yeh because you torment us regularly… thinking about them just sitting with them and the implications would be torture… Christ! Matt hates the Marauders! He'd kill me if he saw me sitting with them!

'I don't know we could always levitate them down… but nah that wouldn't humiliate them enough I say we carry them!' Oh Black wouldn't dare!

'That's a good idea! And with its implications, I doubt you boyfriend would be happy to see you being brought to breakfast carried by yours truly?' Oh Shit I forgot, they new about Matt! How could they be that cruel? Wait what am I saying these threats are empty!

'Ha! You wouldn't dare!'

'Oh really?' Shit! When did Potter get such good reflexes the chauvinistic idiot has just picked me up and worse in a fireman's lift and I'm wearing shorts for Christ sake!

'Potter put me down!' Jesus why do, Lottie and Katie have to be the clever ones and run?

'Come on guys hurry up, I can't hold her like this forever!' Ha struggling. Works like a charm! 'She'll break my shoulder soon.' The Prick! The Ass I swear I'm going to kill him when I get down!

'Go on ahead mate these ones are going to be tricky!' Wow thanks Lupin and hear was me thinking you were the sensible one.

Crap he's really going with me over his shoulder how in Gods name do I get out of this… Crap we in the hall way this is not good… really not good! 'Potter seriously put me down' great he's just laughing and now I'm getting hysterical, 'Potter I'm not joking put me down or I'll do you for sexual harassment!' Okay maybe I screamed that a little loudly.

I don't believe it he's still laughing! Well at least he's put me down! Oh Christ he's really close… and my backs against the wall! Why is he looking down at me like that? Why are his hands still on my waist? Oh God I forgot I'm claustrophobic.

'Are you going to come to breakfast now?' Well his voice is still the same but his expression…

Come on Lily think of something! 'I'm in my pyjamas.' Why am I having problems speaking? And what kind of excuse was that? And why is he just grinning at me like that?

'Take your hoodie off.' What is he insane? My, hoodie with the nice smell? I'm not sacrificing that for the world! Besides I'm only wearing a strappy underneath.

'No I …'

'Just take it off Evans? Or do you want to go to breakfast in you Pyjamas?' fine I'll take it off, okay why is he looking at it curiously… why is he looking at me curiously?

'What do you usually wear?'

'To a game? Er… Jeans and a hoodie I suppose.' I'm still having problems speaking! Okay he just transfigured my clothes… into a pair of relatively tight jeans and top… Plain white I might add which makes me look like a ghost!

'I guess you can borrow this…' My hoodie?

'Borrow it?'

'Yeh well it is mine! What were you doing with it?' Oh Christ!

'Er… Long story,' He's still ridiculously close! 'Shall we go?'

'After you.' Er I don't really have a lot of room to move but I could… wow just managed to squeeze out. Right that was odd…

Okay, not many Slytherins are down yet so I guess I could risk sitting with Potter… Matt's not down yet and there aren't any other Gryffindors so…

'There's hardly anyone here, I think you'll be safe to sit with me!' Crapolla where did he come from… and why is he so close? This is really beginning to annoy me now!

'You like creeping up really close to people don't you?' Hey Potter that's a hint to Move away!

'No not usually. Just consider it pay back for the Chocolates' so that's what this is about.

'It's a pity that potion only lasted for a few hours I preferred you much more when you were Gay!' Wow the look on his face is priceless! I'm not going to forget that one!

Right Coffee, and toast… thinking of coffee I'm sure Lottie and Katie couldn't have out run them for this long!

'So you and Matt Brookes?' Tell me I'm hearing things! Potter asking about boyfriends… maybe some of that love potions still working.

'Yeh why?'

'Just trying to make conversation! So how long has this been going on?' why is he so curious?

'About… I don't know a month. Can we talk about something else?'

'You know Evans those blokes like Brookes they don't usually date Muggle-borns unless they have an ulterior motive…' Okay that does it! I can kind of cope having this kind of useless advice off my friends but when it comes to Potter? OOOOhhhh

'Jesus what is it with everyone's fascination about Matt? I'm only dating him to Piss Bellatrix off! Why is everyone under this illusion that I like him? Does no one know me? I hate him with a passion he's and arrogant possessive pure-blooded bastard!'

'Do you honestly think I'm stupid enough not to know that his main plan is to try and make me fall in love with him so I'll do anything even renounce my friends so he can leave me weak and defenceless so his oh so lovely death-eater friends can torture me to death?'

'Christ what is everyone on? Even Lottie's been saying things like this to me! And she even knows that I don't do emotions I haven't for absolutely ages so why in Gods name is everyone so worried that I'm suddenly going to fall head over heals when I don't do ruddy emotions!' Okay maybe I'm exaggerating a little bit but I'm severely annoyed I think I have a right!

'People are just worried about you Evans…' Wow okay maybe I did go off on a bit of a tangent…oh Crapolla of the people I could have said this to… it had to be Potter.

'I'll probably end it soon, so just lighten up about the whole thing okay?'

'Yeh, but don't get mad at us Evans we're only concerned about you. We just wanted to make sure… well it's obvious you're still sane so I guess we can lighten up now!' wait a minuet _'Us' 'We' _

"_Us', 'We'_ what are you saying you were concerned to Potter?' now this will be interesting. Okay great answers Potter just stare and glare!

'As a fellow Gryffindor yes I was. Gryffindors don't date Slytherins.' Okay honestly I can't fine fault with that but he doesn't have to know I'm just as prejudiced against some of them as he is…

'Jesus Potter what did you do to Piss her off so much?' Thank the lord. Lottie.

'Coffee? Black no sugar just the way you like it!' if I want to get any decent type of conversation out of her then I'm going to sweeten her up first.

'Thank you!'

'Speaking of Black. Where's Sirius?' Good question Potter.

'Oh he's not going to be happy with her!' Yay Lupin and Katie are down. Fully dressed? Did they let them stop off at dorm?

'ha, ha, ha!' that laugh was pure evil, 'I left him in dorm'

'Why would he be bothered about that?'

'Lils I left him in Our dorm!' Oh she wouldn't! with Nat and that lot in there he's of been eaten alive! Especially when most of them aren't even dressed yet! Potters physically blanched! I better laugh! Lily queen of fake laughs!

'How on earth did you get him locked in there?' Wow both Potter and Lupin are white as sheets! If I knew locking them in a room with a group of scantily clad girls scared them this much I would have made it happen more often… wait does this mean their actually gay?

'Is that really so terrible for him Potter? I bet you Black loves it!' good question Katie! Wow I never thought Lottie could laugh for that amount of time!

'Imagine you're the only girl and you've been shoved into the Gryffindor locker rooms… what reputation are you going to get?' put on a great show of sudden realisation, 'precisely! And Sirius takes his reputation extremely seriously!'

'We already know that bit Potter; I doubt theirs a single attractive girl left in the school who Black hasn't had his hands on.' I really need to talk to Katie and Lottie about facial expressions, their look of disgust is entirely too obvious.

'Oh I wouldn't be so hard on yourself Price!' Oh Christ! Now I'm in shit that's Matt! 'Lily what are you doing?'

I hate it when Lottie and Katie exchange looks, when they think I'm not looking, 'Having breakfast'

'With them?' You see what I mean when I say possessive? On that bit I was actually being serious…the bit about him trying to make me fall in love with him and all that's total shit!

'Anything wrong with her having breakfast with us Brookes?' Oh great Black is back! Can things get any worse?

'Not really Black, just surprised that _my_ girlfriend would have breakfast with you.'

'Why would that be surprising? _We're_ all in Gryffindor, and _we're_ all sitting on the Gryffindor table. It would have looked odd if _we_ weren't sitting together.'

'Oh shut up Black, as we were just discussing your reputation precedes you, he was probably just worried about Lily's reputation so shut up and sit down!' Thank god for Lottie!

'Sweet talking me is not going to get you out of the crap you've got yourself in Price!' Wow he really isn't happy. But at least he's sitting down.

'Lily I want you to sit in the Slytherin stands with me today.' Never choke on coffee it is extremely unpleasant!

'What?'

'No now that is absurd Matt! I refuse to let you do that to me! Quidditch matches are our bonding sessions… you are not going to stop me bonding with my friends you can meet Lily after the match, but she is sitting in the Gryffindor stands with me!' Thank you Katie! Oh what did I do for such wonderful friends?

'You can bond with Lottie!'

'Huh? You are joking aren't you? No one can bond with Lottie at a Quidditch match! It's dangerous just to sit next to her, she gets extremely into the games and her arms go everywhere…'

'It's true, once at one of my brothers games I accidentally gave a random person a nose bleed… I didn't even notice until Lily pointed it out to me!'

'Plus she never listens to a word you say and ends up screaming like a banshee at the opposition.' Ah poor Lottie, the truth hurts!

'Fine. But after the match your spending time with me!

'Sorry Hun but I can't I have to see a… I have to visit a psychiatrist afterwards!' oh he doesn't look happy… I think it may just be time to dump him!

* * *

A/N hey guys! I know this is a really pointless chapter and believe me I have loads more to write on it but it's getting to long and it's taken me too long to update to I'm up-dating it as it is! Sorry about any spelling or punctuation and about the swearing! I've got my beta working on a diff story at the moment and she wouldn't be able to do this at the same time so you're getting the UN EDITED story! Please don't shoot me or be too cruel it will be re-hashed and re-posted after my beta has a chance to look at it and chapter 8 should be up really soon! Well please

_**REVIEW **_

And don't be to mean! Lots a love SP


	8. Chapter 8

Sirius protégé

_**Sirius protégé**_

_Oblivious _

_**Disclaimer**_: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine.

_**A/N: Hey guys just to warn you this hasn't been EDITED and there is a bit of strong language! But Enjoy!**_

Chapter 8

**Saturday 10:00: Quidditch stands **

Okay, so before the match I managed to have a very brief chat with Matt, and end things… yes it is true I am a coward why I am in Gryffindor is a mystery! I thought if I did it before the match in a public place with Lottie and Katie near by he wouldn't have a chance to shout and get mad… I was wrong!

I ended up being dragged into the nearest broom closest where I was verbally abused; he went on and on about how he risked so much for me his reputation, the respect of his peers and if his family had found out! He did all this whilst somehow managing not to shout and shower me in spit at the same time. It was impressive! So now I am sitting in the stands watching Potter parade about on his broomstick along with the rest of the Gryffindor team feeling awful, guilty and desperately wanting to have a shower whilst freezing my arse off.

To make matters worse if I was expecting to get any sympathy I was very badly wrong! Katie was so relieved I'd actually ended things she hasn't been able to stop grinning, and Lottie was walking around with an annoying 'I told u so' smirk on her face. I say was because whilst watching the game she has recently discovered the new Ravenclaw beater. Archie Audley is a seventh year, and has always for some reason or another been noticed by Lottie, however as we don't really socialize with that year we have only just found out his name and it has taken Lottie by surprise. Before he was just a 'pretty inanimate object' now he has a name…

Huh? Oh the games over, Gryffindor won… was a close match though Ravenclaw have gotten really good! And on that bright note I now have to go and have my shrink session! Yippee!

**Great hall Supper:**

Well that was fun! I have been psychoanalyzed by a frisky little goblin which it appears has now got a crush on me… It's just great, if I don't attract the wankers I attract the weird magical creatures.

Bloody typical!

You may well laugh but you weren't their and you didn't have to be walked back by something that doesn't even come up to your navel insisting that you, 'have to hold its hand for your own mental gratification'. I've never seen Lottie laugh so much, she had to see the shrink after me and was on her way out when she saw me…

'Smyth' as he asked me to call him, insisted on me introducing him to my friend, when he found out Lottie was his next patient he went bright red and muttered something about it being standard procedure, to which Lottie just doubled over with laughter. When she had finally recovered the slimy little git tried to hold her hand. Lottie

**Whose reflexes and superior wit have always been better than mine…**

Oh go away I am perfectly capable of writing this myself without your embellishments!

**True but my little embellishments are what make it worth reading! :D ha!**

Moving on her response had been to quickly slap him (almost to the other side of the corridor, that girl doesn't know her own strength) after he'd attempted to hold her hand and stated that he should

'**keep his smarmy little hand to himself as trying it on with Lily's best mate would most likely spoil his chances.'** **what made me laugh the most though was the fact that he then turned around and asked if I really thought he stood a chance!**

Great so to sum up my day so far: I have been humiliatingly carried down to breakfast by Potter, who has read my diary and poked his nose into things that weren't any of his business. I have broken up with a possessive boyfriend and am now single only to be pursued by a goblin with nails much longer than any living creature should have. If that wasn't bad enough to top it all off said goblin is being encouraged and being given advise by my best friend, I hope u feel guilty!

**Herm what? Oh not at all!**

Argh!

**When did Potter read your diary?**

Have I not told you about this? Oh well basically… and that's when we woke up to be tormented and chased around the common room. Were you even listening? Or are you too busy staring at your 'pretty inanimate object?

**I am not staring! Its not my fault he's decided to sit directly in my line of sight is it?**

nope but if you carry on to stare like that he will notice, as will the rest of the great hall.

If looks could kill

**Then you would be dead many times over! **

Ha! Where's Katie?

**Shrink, she went in after me. He is pretty though... you have to admit!**

I don't know he looks a bit like a mouse to me…

**How does he look like a mouse?**

Well he's got a rather pointed nose, and his jaw line isn't that strong… to be fair I think it's the long hair that's really dose it

**It's not that long it is above his shoulders!**

Just face it… it is long!

_What's long?_

**Yay your back! Audley's hair, Lily says he look like a mouse…**

_He does look a bit like a mouse, don't look at me like that I've already told you, you have good taste…_

**Ha!**

_Anyway, Lily what did you say to that goblin? He wouldn't shut up about you!_

Oh god!

**Hahahahaha…**

_Was that really necessary?_

Laughing like that? Of course it was necessary she could have done herself an injury! And besides you can never over estimate the use of a silencing charm! :D

_Whatever tell me about Smyth?_

There is nothing to tell! I didn't do anything; he's just taken a fancy to me, which has been encouraged by that silent hyena over there! How did your session go?

_Fine! Barely touched on anything remotely to do with the fight it consisted mainly of talking about you! How was Lottie's?_

I don't know… er wait a second

**Thank you for that! mine was fine we talked about the fight a little bit, and he told me a should apologize to Black for hitting him and turning him gay, apparently it will be good for my self esteem, how I'm not sure.**

Right my loved ones I have to go and do prefect rounds… but on the Brightside, we won the Quidditch match which means they'll be a party to look forward to when I get back!

**Prefect rounds… **

Most prefects hate prefect rounds, but personally I don't mind them. The portraits are always very talkative and you'd be amazed about some of the things you can find out!

For instance did you know that Archie Audley is apparently the Ravenclaw version of the Marauders? Yep according to a portrait outside the Ravenclaw common room of a renowned dragon slayer; he comes from an old wizarding family and has just recently broken up with his girlfriend from Hufflepuff. This has apparently caused a great deal of excitement and not a single Ravenclaw girl will shut up about it, the poor portrait is at its wits end! Something to tease Lottie about though…

On a more serious note however the portrait also told me that darling little Olivia is apparently harboring some seriously undesirable ideals. This worries me a great deal. Olivia's has always been loopy but her behavior of late has been scary! And she has been hanging around with the Slytherins much more…

Ouch, oops… oh shit!

Guess who I have just bumped (literally) into? Its very cliché… you know sometimes I think god created man simply to make him laugh, I bet you he is constantly in hysterics.

'Sorry!' smile? What else do I say? After all it's not like I know Audley or any of his friends and I am doing prefect rounds, I have a right to be here… what are they doing out of house at this time anyway?

'It's ok, are you having a nice chat with Boris?' Audley looks very amused; I wonder how much of the conversation he heard?

'Well, Prefect rounds are boring, and Boris is entertaining'

'Why t'ank you Love your very entertainin' too, not everyday I get to talk to such a beautiful lass as y'urself' I don't believe it, a portrait has made me blush!

'You're a Gryffindor prefect right? Sixth year?'

'Er yes…'

'So you're waiting around to gloat or is the Ravenclaw common room out of bounds?'

'No, no' oh crap! Thank god he's laughing

'I'm only joking, anyway we would quiet like to get in… if you would er' he's making a gesture for me to move on, of course they can hardly get in when I'm there to hear the password!

'Yeh no worries' and move away slowly

'Was that Evans?' why is Audley asking about me?

'Yeh'

'I can see what Potter means!' What Potter means? What does that mean? Sigh, well I guess it is Official god is pissing himself!

Merlin's beard I'm tired not to mention confused, why would Potter talk about me? I didn't even know Potter and Audley were friends. Although… they both come from very old families both of which are very influential and speak out against Voldemort. I guess it would be odd if they didn't, not to mention they are in the same year, ah this is making my head hurt.

'Good evening Basil, any hormonal couples up there tonight?' Basil is a monk who was very influential to the progress of astronomy. Absolutely barking mad though!

'Good evening Lily, yes and no' what? Oh please don't tell me I have to break up a make out session! Wait what does he mean no?

'What do you mean yes and no?'

'Well you see I've often observed that hormonal teenagers are like wolves...' right. Okay, like I said barking!

'Really?'

'Yes in the sense that they normally travel together like a pack, but they went up there separately which makes me think they're not hormonal, I think they're studying.' well I guess there is a certain logic to his madness.

'Right well I better go and check anyway, thank you Basil.' please be working please be working! I don't want to have to break up a hormonal couple, with all the giggling and sneaking glances at each other the whole time, it make you feel very awkward… wait a second I know that voice…

Oh god how did I forget? Bellatrix and Snape's little rendez vous! I wonder if I can sneak under one of the desks… with my natural grace, and I use that term loosely, it would be a miracle if I don't make some kind of noise… ah well I guess miracles can happen. Right so what are they going on about.

'The Dark Lord has a great interest in you darling, he's heard wonderful things, and once he takes an interest in you he can be very difficult to avoid.'

Oh god

'I am flattered that someone as powerful as the dark lord should find me of interest...'

'As you should be!' She looks like a religious zealot, the way she's speaking, she has to be psychotic! 'After all you are only a half-blood, you should be honored he even knows your name!'

'Like I said I am honored and I, I agree, to an extent, with the Dark Lords cause, but I, I would just like some more time...'

'Well pet I'm afraid your time has run out, you have week to give your answer.' She's leaving thank god! I've never seen Bellatrix look so unhinged before, I mean yes she's always been bonkers but she looked possessed! 'And remember love, the Dark Lord doesn't take kindly to rejection.'

Very Dramatic! Oh Poor Snape! Although to be fair he doesn't exactly look like he's been hit in the stomach with a sledge hammer! He's just been told to join Voldemort or die; I would be crying with despair… mind you it must be tough for him. He's been picked on by the Marauders and everyone else since he came here, and then to be put in Slytherin with all their pure blooded mania can't have been easy seeing as he's a half blood. He's been rejected by those on the outside and inside; and now the one those on the outside fear and on the inside look up to has taken an interest in him. A half blood. I guess it's not really surprising he looks almost triumphant he finally has a chance to fit in, he has the last laugh. I have to wonder how much he agrees with Voldemort's cause though… after all he could simply see it as he has no choice, the other side don't want him have scorned him, under Voldemort he has a chance to gain revenge.

Oh how depressing! Finally he's left herm… I need to talk to the others, or should I go to Dumbledore straight away? No I should go and find the others.

**Gryffindor tower:**

Right well I am so tired, Black had spiked the punch with firewhisky! The result being I am now not only drunk but the alcohol has made me sleepy! I need to find the others but it is so packed in here! And I really wish people would stop offering me drinks! Great I think that's Lottie and Alice by the window.

'Hi Lils you ok?' Lottie's sober? Oh no she's not good!

'I need to talk to you, all of us now in dorm!'

'Ok!' Alice is a little too eager is seems

'Why are you so eager?' I have to know

'I've been trying to persuade her that she should go and find Frank, he's drunk enough not to remember if she makes a fool of herself'

'Lottie does have a point!'

'But you said you had something really important to talk to us about that couldn't wait! And what kind of friends would we I be if I went off to find frank now?' touché well played!

'Ok good point. Where's Katie?'

'I don't know… wait I think I see her over their, you sure this can't wait?'

'Yes! Oh there she is talking to Lupin…' wow looks like an intense conversation, 'lets go and rescue her.'

'Erm Lils, I don't think she needs rescuing'

'What do you mean? Of course she does!'

'Look at her face! Whatever they're talking about is important she obviously doesn't want to be interrupted.'

'Erm guys I'll meet you in dorm' great the arrival of frank means the disappearance of Alice. And Lottie, Lottie is now in a heated Quidditch debate with Black, Hunter and Jones. Oh sod it, I'll tell them tomorrow because right now I am going to go to sleep.

I tried to tell the others about what I over heard but by the time I found them, I'd been offered about 6 shots and 4 glasses of punch and couldn't quite manage to get the words out. Not to mention they were in no state to hear it, the music was too loud to have a conversation about something as important as that anyway!

Oh and I did something very, very, very wrong! Well technically I didn't do it, it was done to me but we'll get to that later. I finally found Lottie who was Surprisingly sober, well basically sober she was having a very civilized conversation with Alice who was well a little worse for wear, Lottie was trying to persuade her that finding Frank would be a good idea, she's such a little stirrer now I think about it! Anyway I managed to convey that I had a number of things that were very important to talk to them about.

Alice I might add seemed very relieved about that. So we went in search of Katie, who was cornered by Lupin of all people, who seemed to be talking to her in earnest. Well we like the good friends we are went over to rescue her when we got a very clear signal telling us not to.

**Gryffindor tower: Girls dorm**

Oh my head hurts! I am so tired, and I oh no I did not! No, no I defiantly didn't that has to be a dream, a rather disturbing dream but a dream all the same because I fell asleep on one of the sofa's… Oh Merlin's beard!

I think this is what happened at any rate. I woke up and decided to go in search of the girls' staircase after failing several times to locate the girls' staircase I sat down on a couch where I was surprisingly joined by Potter not long afterwards. I didn't think much of this, to begin with I mean nearly everyone had left by then but the Marauders are usually the last to leave. He seemed to be apologizing for his behavior and asking me about matt and when I was going to break up with him, and find someone more suitable.

I was very gracious and accepted his apology and explained that I had broken up and already found someone more suitable, a goblin called Smyth. But then he didn't leave. Now that made me uncomfortable so I decided to leave and see if I could locate the girls' staircase again. Unfortunately in my attempt to get up I fell down on Potters lap. Now I decided to ignore the fact that at that point we were very close and he was looking at me very oddly and logically I came to the conclusion that Potter is in fact more sober than me, so I asked him if he knew where the girl's staircase was and could he please take me there… the next thing I knew, we were kissing. I remember thinking this was a bad idea and I should stop, but the more logical part of my brain decided to speak up and told me that he had kissed me and seeing as he is a lot bigger and stronger than me there might not be that much I can do about it.

You know sometimes I hate myself! Oh Crap!

Lottie has just opened the curtains and pulled the covers off!

What did you do that for?

**Good morning Lilykins! And how are we feeling today? A little worse for wear perhaps? **

Yes, why are you grinning? What have I done? Oh no I think I know where this is going!

_You kissed Potter! Or can you not remember?_

I did not!

**Well you did! Now what happened? **

You know all of this can be blamed on you too!

_Really, how?_

Well leaving me by myself is stupid to do at the best of times, not to mention when I'm drunk and dopey!

**Well would you like to be filled in?**

No!

_Well I'm afraid I was down there, mulling something over, when it happened, so If you don't want to tell us I can tell you my version…_

That really won't be necessary! Look all that happened was he kissed me and I was too drunk to do anything about it. Lottie don't look so skeptical it's the truth!

_Well that fits, with what I saw._

**Herm.**

What were you mulling over anyway?

_I… I can't tell you._

**Why?**

_It's not my secret to tell! I'm sorry but its not I just… figured something out._

**Has this got anything to do with what you and Lupin were talking about last night? Because that seemed pretty intense!**

_I can't say, seriously I can't give you any clues!_

Oh Merlin's beard I almost forgot! Whilst we're on the topic of secrets you won't believe what I over heard in the astronomy tower during my rounds, this is what I was trying to tell you last night… 

**A/N:**

Hey, well I'm back for a little bit! I know I haven't updated in about 4 years but I randomly checked my reviews yesterday and couldn't believe someone had reviewed this year! So I decided to give it another go seeing as I'm on holiday at the moment. Now I don't have a beta anymore, so spelling, punctuation and grammar don't exist and I haven't written it for years, so it may not be what you're expecting! But let me know what you think!

And remember to **REVIEW**

Thanks SP


	9. Chapter 9

_**Sirius protégé**_

_Oblivious _

_**Disclaimer**_: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine.

_**A/N: Hey guys just to warn you this hasn't been EDITED and there is a bit of strong language! But Enjoy!**_

* * *

Chapter 9

**Great Hall: Breakfast**

_Are you serious?_

Yes! I mean what do we do? Should we tell somebody?

**Well that's what we should do, but if we do what will happen to Snape? Or for that matter us?**

Well we can't just sit on it we have to do something… Lottie will you stop staring at Audley!! We have a serious issue here distractions are not allowed!

**Huh what? I'm staring into space and thinking, Audley's at the other end of the Hall!**

Ok no need to be so snappish

**Well then don't assume the worst**

_I think we should tell Dumbledore he'll know how to deal with the situation tactfully_

I hardly think that was the worst thing I could assume!

_Guys…_

**Yes Kate I think your right. Lils you have rounds tonight right?**

Yes… I'll see if I can see him before that.

**We'll go with you, and we'll join you on your rounds. We should see if any of the portraits have heard anything else… **

That reminds me Olivia is getting a little too close with the Slytherins' some of the portraits… well mainly Boris has been complaining about it, 'It's unnatural for a Ravenclaw lass to be hanging out with that Slytherin scum' I believe were his exact words.

**I have a feeling I'm going to like Boris **

_I think I will too _

Ah that reminds me, I've got some info on Audley if you want it…

**I don't want it**

Apparently he's… what?

**I don't want it. He's a pretty inanimate object no more; anymore information other than his name and he'll stop being an inanimate object and that will just ruin my fun. Do you want to ruin my fun?**

_Yes_

Yes

**Hey!**

Lottie shut up, as I was saying he's apparently quite the catch in Ravenclaw, and he has recently broken up with his girlfriend…

**Potters walked in**

What?! Where?

**From the general direction of the door idiot where else would he have walked in from?**

Hide me!!

_But it will be so much more amusing if we don't! _

I never knew you were so evil!!

**Neither did I… I'm impressed!**

Lottie Price if you don't wipe that maniacal grin off of your face and get me out of here, I swear to god I will tell Audley about him being your 'pretty inanimate object'!

**Fine, Kate if you go distract Lupin and Potter I'll smuggle this red faced idiot out of here.**

_Fine I guess but you owe me!_

Why?

_You're depriving me of my fun! On a serious note I need to talk to Remus anyway, so shouldn't be too much of a problem_

Oh gods please don't let him see me!!

**It's your own fault for getting with him!**

I was drunk!

**Pathetic excuse!**

How are we going to do this…?

**I have no idea**

Oh great that fills me with joy!

**We're just going to have to find you a Human shield… Look there's a group of Hufflepuffs' leaving over there if we're quick we can walk out with them and he won't see! **

You really think this will work?

**Nope but he won't be able to talk to you if you look like your busy**

But then he'll know I'm avoiding him…

**You just asked me to get you out of here not stop him from seeing you altogether**

True.

**Charms: **

What was I thinking? Potter? Of all people one of the most arrogant, incorrigible boys in the entire school! Eugh, I never liked the guy much to begin with but at least it wasn't awkward before… I shouldn't have done it I just shouldn't have done it!!

_You could do worse than Potter you know… and if it makes you feel any better he didn't see you leave, he er… was worried about a different issue. _

Thank Merlin! What issue?

_I can't say… it's not my issue to talk about. _

**Same thing that you were talking to Remus about last night?**

_Same area yes_

**Well that's interesting…**

What is?

**I, I have managed to finish this charm before you… I think that's the first time ever**

Well I have been distracted!

**Excuses, excuses face it you're slipping!**

I am not!! Oh don't you raise your eyebrow at me you smug git! Watch this!

…

_Watch what?_

What charm exactly is it we're meant to be practicing?

Oh great rolling eyes and exchanging glances, I am right here I can see both of you!

_Well if it makes you feel any better you have a date with your boyfriend after this…_

Boyfriend?

**I believe Smyth is waiting for your next session with an unnatural amount of anticipation. **

Oh great and I thought today was going to be a good day!

**Gryffindor Common room: after prefect rounds**

I am sorry about the time gap, but after charms I just didn't have time to write. The day past fairly uneventfully. I say that even though I did leave my shrink session with an embarrassing amount of flowers. I also had a rather nasty run in with Matt, which was followed by me bumping into Potter but as I was juggling flowers books and a large amount of emotional baggage, I managed to deal with him normally… I say normally meaning me on a very bad day, so imagine a Hungarian Horntail with bad pmt… yes? Now imagine it ten times worse and you've got me. Yes I snapped and insulted, but the fact that Smyth was following me singing some goblin wedding song and refusing to stop until I said yes to a question I hadn't been listening too in the first place, meant most of the sting was lost from my words and Potter seemed more amused than anything else.

In fact every Gryffindor and Ravenclaw who had just come out of seventh year DADA found the whole scene very amusing, and witnessed my humiliation as I tried desperately to escape from Smyth with a great deal of laughter. Thankfully Smyth got embarrassed by all the people watching and ran to his office as if his life depended on it. Which it did because I was very close to impaling him with the flowers… I'm not sure if you can impale someone with flowers but I was defiantly going to try! And throughout this whole ordeal Potter instead of helping me attempted polite conversation and small talk over the wailing that was Smyth's attempt at singing. The boy is a prat, I mean I was a damsel in distress; he looks the part of a knight why can't he act like one?

He can kiss though… I do have to give him that.

And as for my so called friends… well I guess Katie can be excused she wasn't there but Lottie was on her way to see Smyth and witnessed the entire thing, she just stood there shaking like a hyena before running after Smyth to ask if her session was now cancelled. She even took a flower apparently it was a peace offering/ prop for persuasion. Humph persuade my arse! Personally I think she was going to use it like a wire and attempt to garrote him if he said no.

That pretty much sums up the mess that was today, I hid in the library for the rest of the day, my two last periods were free session, I love it when that happens! So now I am in the common room waiting patiently for the others to turn up so we can go and talk to Dumbledore… I'm still not sure if we should but this is the type of thing he should know about right?

If the big V really is trying to recruit students before they've even left school then Hogwarts isn't as safe as everyone thinks it is… so Dumbledore should be made aware of the situation. Although you think he'd already know, he usually knows everything anyway but he has this way of making you feel he is more oblivious than he is. Ah good the others are here.

**Girl's dorm: Post Dumbledore meeting, prefect rounds and total catastrophe!**

Total catastrophe is putting it mildly. My god I could have my prefect badge taken away for this how the Marauders sneak into the other houses and come away unscathed is beyond me! And it's your entire bloody fault!

**Ok so it wasn't the best of ideas, but relax they're not going to tell anyone. They don't even who we are! For sure…**

_And you found out some rather interesting stuff._

Will you stop laughing! This is all so hilarious for you but they knew who I was, and I actually found out a few things I really didn't want to know!

**Really? Your previous actions suggest otherwise…**

Oh you can't talk! I don't think I have ever seen you dig your own grave so quickly before it was embarrassing!

**Yes… for you! You just stood there silent and staring they must have thought you were mentally ill… **

Lottie stop being such a brat!

**I am not a brat!**

Your right Bitch is much more appropriate

…**oh I can't argue with that.**

_Should I be worried that you sound proud about that fact?_

**Probably: D**

Go away I want to write this down! Thank you.

Well the meeting with Dumbledore went pretty much as expected. He was already aware of Snape's involvement and assured us that he had an eye on the situation at hand, he also offered us a sherbet lemon (which I love!) and gave 10 points to Gryffindor to each of us. At that point in time it looked like it was going to be a good night…

Prefect rounds are when it all started to go south. We did the majority of my rounds first so we finished outside the picture of Boris, I usually try and do that part first because of the astronomy tower… we started in the dungeons down near the Slytherin common room. There's a painting down there of an old Astronomy teacher, Professor Graves, I never speak to him as I think he was actually in Slytherin and is not likely to have a charming disposition or caring nature. If he does it probably means he's gone mad, after all the mad version of a Slytherin is a sane person right?

Anyway I know that he is near the port hole to Slytherin house so he can see whose coming and going and might have some rather interesting information. Now I was feeling in a good mood so I bounced up to him with Katie and Lottie behind me and playfully said in my impression of a sergeant majors voice, 'Hello Graves! Any interesting activity to report?'

Now I have to admit he took me by surprise, he is one of the most charming and cultured paintings I have ever spoken too! But then again being stuck in a frame for a living must drive you mad at some point right? Well at first he just told me normal gossip; Bellatrix was having issues with her boyfriend again, the poor psychotic cow. Snape was apparently spending all his time in one of the potion annex's, from what Graves could gather it was very intense stuff. All of this wasn't particularly unusual. Then he noticed Lottie and Katie, this was when the questions started rolling…

'What are you three lovely girls doing loitering in the dungeons at this time of night? It's not respectable you know?'

At this point Lottie interrupted me, unfortunately with good reason; after all if Graves is giving us information he is sure to give it out to others as well… so she came out with 'well try as we might we can't quite seem to keep ourselves within the bounds of respectability!'

Graves laughed, so Lottie being Lottie carried on, 'No we're looking for our friend Olivia Thompson? We know she hangs out here sometimes as she's friends with some of the Slytherins and we were hoping to find her…'

'Oh you mean that small pretty one… that always wears too much make-up?' we nod, ' ah yes she's down here a lot,' well that wasn't comforting but it got worse, 'she's been spending a lot of time with Matt Brookes, two are practically attached at the hip, although he's only recently broken up with some girl.' Well we knew that as I was said girl!

'Oh wow I did not know that!' Lottie and I exchanged glances and Katie took over

'So she's in with that crowd then? All the purebloods?' the way Katie said it made her sound envious.

'Oh yes, they've taken quite a shine to her which is odd as they normally don't socialize outside of their house… if I see her I'll tell her you were looking for her, er who are you?'

'we're in her house but not her year, we were actually on our way to the kitchens but a guy in our house, is looking for her so we said we'd tell her if we saw her…' Katie as always quick with the excuses and also managed to avoid giving out names which probably would have been our down fall… not that it matters anyway.

Well we left after that, having discovered that Olivia is well on her way to being a future death eater, as she is defiantly hanging out with at least one if not two already. On our way out of the dungeons we passed the annex that Snape was in and I can tell you he was not brewing anything that was necessary for school! Not only did it smell awful but he kept on muttering about a test, and how he must not fail and scribbling in an old text book. It was creepy I can tell you… Lottie was determined that he was up to something more and wanted to sneak into the annex and find out what… we managed to stop that disastrous idea.

The rest of rounds passed fairly uneventfully until we got to Boris. Who was fuming. I have no idea what happened but he was in no condition to talk too… there was a crowd of Ravenclaws standing in the hall way trying to persuade him to let them in. This is where Katie had her brilliant idea, (now you cannot see or hear it but I am in fact rolling my eyes and being very sarcastic when I say that) she convinced me that if I did my prefectly duty and convinced Boris to open the port hole that Lottie and herself could sneak in with the other Ravenclaws… this is pretty much how it played out:

Convinced that this stupid idea would work, I made my way over to Boris, barging my way through a number of tall, and some rather muscular Ravenclaw's. I shouted for everyone to 'Shut up' and quickly discovered that the resident Ravenclaw prefects were missing in action… considering they're a couple I wasn't surprised that no one had risked finding them. So naturally I decided to take charge, I was vaguely aware that Lottie and Katie had slipped somewhere into the small pack of Ravenclaw's standing behind me and so I turned to Boris and asked what I thought was as simple question.

'What's going on Boris? Why do I have a pack of Ravenclaw's in my hallway?' friendly enough right? I thought I was being fairly respectful, so why he started screeching profanities at me I have no idea! So I turned to the nearest Ravenclaw to ask what was going on. She claimed that the password had been changed and as no one could find the prefects they couldn't get into the house… it seemed simple enough to me I was just about to suggest that one of them should go and look in the Astronomy tower for their prefects when I heard a 'Psssssst' coming from behind me.

I turned around and saw Boris pressed right up against the frame of his portrait trying to whisper in my ear, so I obliged him and lent close to the portrait to he could reach my ear… 'dey're not all Ravenclaws lass…'

Oh shit, pretty much sums up how I felt at that moment, 'But you had them queuing up out hear before Lottie and Katie sneaked into the group?

'Oh you're friends are trying to smuggle in are d'hey? (Insert large chortle from Boris) Why?'

'You didn't know?! Oh… BORIS! So you're saying some of these Ravenclaws aren't Ravenclaws? Do you know which ones aren't?'

'Nah course I don't… but I was tipped off…'

'Tipped off… by who?'

'That's not the point lass! The point is that Slytherin scum is trying to infiltrate the house!'

At that point I took a brief look around and realized that the majority of people stuck in the corridor were the average Ravenclaw geeks who had probably stayed late in the library… whoever had tipped Boris off was playing a joke.

**

* * *

**

**A/N:**

Hey, well I'm back for a little bit! I know I haven't updated in about 4 years but I randomly checked my reviews yesterday and couldn't believe someone had reviewed this year! So I decided to give it another go seeing as I'm at uni at the moment and have exams, I wouldn't hope for another up-date soon!

Now I don't have a beta anymore, so spelling, punctuation and grammar don't exist and I haven't written it for years, so it may not be what you're expecting! But let me know what you think!

And remember to **REVIEW**

Thanks SP


	10. Chapter 10

_**Sirius protégé**_

_Oblivious _

_**Disclaimer**_: Every thing you read here belongs to the wonderful J K Rowling and not me! Everything you don't recognize as J K Rowling's' is mine.

_**A/N: Hey guys just to warn you this hasn't been EDITED and there is a bit of strong language! But Enjoy!**_

Chapter 10

'Boris, who tipped you off?'

He scowled at me before rather sheepishly saying, 'I don't know, I over heard a group of boys yesterday saying that d'hey over heard some girls saying that d'hey were going to try an' infiltrate de house yonder nigh…'

'Yonder whata?'

'Yonder nigh, lass Tonight! You know for a smart girl you're not very quick are ya?'

Well I gave him a withering look which rather appropriately caused his knees to knock, audibly together. Now when you're in the same house as the Marauders and you go to a school full of silly and insecure girls. You get used to hearing crazy plans, from girls trying to sneak into different houses to see their boyfriends… this most probably being the problem caused me to let out an exasperated sigh of frustration.

'Boris, were these boys talking about their girlfriends by any chance?'

'I don't know… d'hey may have made some rather disgraceful comments that suggested d'hey were.'

'Right and how often have you faced girlfriends trying to sneak into the house?'

'Well d'hey're never stupid enough to use de port hole lass. D'hey normally use the window to the side… or a broom…' then in a conspirators whisper muttered, 'at least that's what I tell them to do, got to let de boys have d'heir fun. (insert chortle) although I'll hav you know I tell the boys that come knockin' at my door where they can stick their…'

'Yes thank you Boris. Now I hate to point the obvious, like you said for a smart girl I'm not very quick, but if you have no issues with girlfriends sneaking in to see their boyfriends, then why are you keeping your hard working Ravenclaws' out in my hallway?'

'Did I mention you looked very pretty dis evenin?' A large beaming smile and an irish accent is hard to resist, even if it is from a painting.

So I smiled and rolled my eyes, 'now that's all cleared up, you couldn't let my friends sneak through could you?' I whispered batting my eyelashes and dazzling him with my most charming smile. 'Lottie's Olivia's sister and well she's worried and from what you've been saying she has a right to be… so would you mind?' it was worth a shot…

Unfortunately it crashed and burned.

'No lass! You know the rules… you either use de window or a broom' wink, 'now be off with ya so I can let dis sorry lot in.' And that was all I could get from him, so I signaled to Lottie and Katie to come away and quickly filled them in on what had happened.

I thought that would be the end of the 'sneaking into Ravenclaw plan'… but no. Lottie quickly got taken with the window idea, and before I could stop her thought it would be a fantastic plan to jump through the window and sneak in.

Well I couldn't let her go on her own now could I? so I went to make sure she didn't cause too much mayhem and Katie stayed behind talking to Boris and keeping watch.

Right now the window thing might not make much sense, but this is how it works. Ravenclaw is a tower like Gryffindor, unlike Gryffindor it had a window right next to the port hole, that does not lead into the tower but rather just had a rather large ledge on the outside which one could use, if one so desired, to walk around the side of the tower until you got to a window that happened to lead into what we thought would be the common room.

Unfortunately there turned out to be another reason why Boris didn't suggest the window ideas to boys… the first window you come across, does lead to the common room but it doesn't open, except for a small vent at the top, and it's a long drop to the floor from there so you would be insane to do that. The second window leads into one of the boys dorms.

Now whilst I stayed shivering on a ledge, contemplating how it had not crossed the teachers' minds that students where horny enough to risk death, Lottie checked to see if anyone was actually in the dorm. It was empty which was odd as it was past curfew. But still seduced by the warmth and the fact that I was much less likely to die on the other side of the window we snuck in.

Now this was the easy bit we cast a silencing bubble around ourselves and quickly sneaked from the boys dorm to the common room to Olivia's dorm, after getting it wrong twice, where we found her diary. Lottie sat down to read the whole thing… in a room full of sleeping girls. I had the fantastic idea of copying it so we could get out as quickly as possible I was starting to get nervous, and as it turned out for good reason.

We sneaked back down to the common room and almost made it back to the boys dorm, when we heard voices coming from there… the door opened, we ran and dived behind one of the sofa's.

Audley and his friends came out, which of course had to include the Ravenclaw prefect, Johnny Kensingthorpe. As he never attended any of the prefect meetings it was unlikely he would recognize me… I hoped.

Anyway they sat on the sofa's and began talking, at first we paid no attention; we crawled around the edge of the sofa's in our silent bubbles trying to get to the port hole. Then however Audley sat up abruptly and said, 'Oh you'll never guess what has finally happened? Potter finally got with that Evans girl!' I immediately stopped moving which meant Lottie crawled right into my arse.

Well I was shocked, and mouthed 'what does he mean finally?' to Lottie she didn't get it so we finally removed our silent bubbles and I repeated it in a whisper. However I didn't have to wait long to get an answer because Johnny piped up, 'really?! Dam I knew I should have gone in on the pool! He's liked her for so long now and done nothing I thought he never would… good on him though, she's hot.'

I couldn't believe it, both Lottie and I were in shock we couldn't speak let alone move, but there was more.

'Yeh, saw them talking outside DADA today, I got the impression he hasn't exactly won her over yet…'

'Really?'

'Yeh, she looked very flustered, and was being rather waspish' he laughed 'might have had something to do with that odd goblin though…'

'I noticed that whats with that,' laughs from all round which was followed with a debate about Smyth… whilst I was frozen with shock, more from the fact that I was feeling defensive about Smyth rather than from this sudden revelation about Potter. Lottie nudged me and so we started crawling toward the port hole again.

Unfortunately, as was probably inevitable, they saw us.

It started with one of his friends saying, 'er what are you doing?'

We didn't realize they were talking to us so we carried on before Audley piped up, 'Girls, crawling on the floor, what are you doing?'

Shit, I think is a marvelous word which pretty much describes how we felt.

'Erm… sorry,' we got up, much more dignified standing. 'We…well we erm…' I couldn't speak, luckily Lottie jumped in.

'We got midnight munchies, but we know that it's past curfew and didn't want to be caught by the prefect.' Good enough excuse I could have beamed at her but my face was numb with panic.

'Right and you thought by crawling on the floor we wouldn't notice?' one of the friends piped up… I don't know his name so I shall call him pie-face.

'That was the general idea,' Lottie smiled whilst speaking through her teeth.

'You're not in Ravenclaw!' Audley suddenly stated.

'Yes I am!' Lottie said defensively, 'the world doesn't just revolve around your year you know!'

'No I know you might be, although I've never… noticed you before, but I know Evans isn't. What are you doing here?' Suddenly alert, 'How long were you crawling behind the sofas?

I couldn't speak, so Lottie did… thinking about it, she actually came out with some good excuses.

'She was visiting me, we forgot the time… real reason we didn't want you to see us.' She stared at Audley defiantly. He tried to stare her down, when she didn't budge he smirked an infuriating smile, I could see her hands clench in irritation.

'Ok' he muttered still smiling, 'Boris let her in?'

'No,' she replied casually, 'She had to use the ledge.'

'The ledge? What ledge?' Pie-face obviously never had a girl sneak in to see him.

'_The_ ledge mate!' Audley rolled his eyes, 'so she snuck in through our dorm?' he was still smirking at Lottie. Her face turned moody, and she looked at the ceiling before looking at me. Now this may sound odd, but that is generally how Lottie reacts when she's around someone she's attracted to, but also feels uncomfortable around… Unfortunately Audley it seems had come across that before, his smirk just got bigger.

'Apparently so.' Short and too the point… another sign that I somehow needed to get Lottie out of there… but I couldn't talk, not to mention I was painfully embarrassed.

He pouted slightly, 'Kitchens…' he said looking at her through lowered lashes, nodding slightly, 'I may join you.'

'Awe yeh kitchen trip!' pie-face appears to be a well placed nickname.

'I could murder a butter-beer…' Johnny muttered.

Lottie looked at me then suddenly put a coy smile on her face, her tone remained dark but partnered with the smile it gained a completely different meaning 'why don't you give me a list? I'll bring back a basket, we can have feast…'

Pie-face giggled, 'butter bear, some pie, and cookies and oh whats that other thing that I love?'

'Butter-beer for me then thanks, and I let this one slide… for both of you,' Johnny smiled kindly, he reminded me a bit of Remus.

Audley however had lost his smile, Lottie's change in attitude must have alerted him to something, his eyes remained bright but piercing, Lottie didn't budge so he turned his stare to me. I was surprised at myself, my face remained blank, 'Ok yeh same,' corners of his mouth twitched

We turned; I was out of the port hole, when Johnny suddenly piped up, 'if you're going for a midnight feast why are you still in uniform?'

Lottie turned and flashed a smile over her shoulder at him, before jumping out and slamming the portrait shut, of course Boris complained, then she muttered run.

So we did, grabbing Katie by the arm we half dragged her down the hall before she found her feet, we could here people following us and then the oddest thing happened, one minute I was running the next I was on the floor, as if I'd run into someone but there was no one in the hallway.

Lottie grabbed me and dragged me behind a tapestry; Katie was crouching behind a statue.

They appeared, Audley, and Johnny, pie-face and the others obviously couldn't be bothered…

'Where did they go?' Johnny muttered.

'I have no idea, but I can tell you one thing, that brunette was not in Ravenclaw!'

'What gave it away? The bad excuses or the coy looks?' Audley shook his head laughing good heartedly at his friend's sarcasm.

'God Potters going to kill me!' Audley muttered pulling at his hair.

'He may not find out…'

'True but when he does… He's going to kill me,' Audley grinned laughing, before asking, 'Kitchens?' and they both disappeared.

We waited five minutes then pegged it back to Gryffindor tower where I immediately documented everything in here….

I can't believe he likes me!

My life is so screwed up, why, why do bad things happen to good people… maybe if I go to sleep I won't wake up!

Argh one can hope!

**A/N:**

Hey, well I'm back for a little bit! I know I haven't updated in about 4 years but I randomly checked my reviews yesterday and couldn't believe someone had reviewed this year! So I decided to give it another go seeing as I'm at uni at the moment and have exams, I wouldn't hope for another up-date soon!

Now I don't have a beta anymore, so spelling, punctuation and grammar don't exist and I haven't written it for years, so it may not be what you're expecting! But let me know what you think!

Also… I am aware that I have made a mistake when it comes to the Ravenclaw commonroom :D but have yet to figure out how to fix… anyway enjoy and I promise it will be fixed!

And remember to **REVIEW**

Thanks SP


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